Red Flags in Relationships Part 2 | TBN

Red Flags in Relationships Part 2

Watch Red Flags in Relationships Part 2
June 11, 2019
27:33

Victory with Paul Daugherty

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Red Flags in Relationships Part 2

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  • to say there are some serious red flags out there
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  • in relationships that we need to pay attention to.
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  • How many y'all think God's way for relationships
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  • is better than the world's way for relationships, right?
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  • This is specifically for singles this week,
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  • but married people don't check out.
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  • Where's the singles at, if you're single,
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  • raise your hand, where's the singles at?
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  • Come on, make some noise.
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  • Look around, scope out the territory.
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  • Hi, I'm Paul, almost 10 years ago,
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  • my dad, my hero, my pastor, passed away unexpectedly.
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  • He built a big church
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  • and left some pretty large shoes to fill.
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  • When he died, I didn't just lose my dad, I lost my faith,
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  • I lost my purpose and my future.
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  • But God showed up and restored my faith,
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  • and he gave me a message of hope to share with you.
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  • You're here on purpose, God's not finished with you yet.
  • 00:00:53.060 --> 00:00:57.070
  • Your best days are right in front of you,
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  • and you have victory in your life,
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  • because Jesus lives in you.
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  • Number 13, if he or she wants to control everything,
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  • if you never get to make a decision,
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  • if they're making all of the decisions, this is a red flag.
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  • If she asks for all your passwords after the first date,
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  • (congregation laughs) this is a red flag.
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  • "I need your passwords, ASAP."
  • 00:01:28.210 --> 00:01:31.060
  • "No, we just met one hour ago."
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  • Now over time, there should be accountability,
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  • there should be that mutual respect,
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  • making decisions together,
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  • but if there is an over controlling in every decision,
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  • this is a red flag.
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  • This doesn't disappear, it doesn't magically go away
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  • in marriage, it amplifies in marriage.
  • 00:01:51.020 --> 00:01:53.210
  • If this is you, if you are controlling person, own it,
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  • and just say Lord, help me to stop be such a control freak,
  • 00:01:57.090 --> 00:02:01.030
  • Lord, help me to learn how to trust,
  • 00:02:01.030 --> 00:02:03.100
  • help me not to try to control everything in my life
  • 00:02:03.100 --> 00:02:06.010
  • 'cause eventually you'll realize
  • 00:02:06.010 --> 00:02:07.070
  • you can't control everything in your life.
  • 00:02:07.070 --> 00:02:09.070
  • I can't control everyone in my life
  • 00:02:09.070 --> 00:02:10.220
  • so I've gotta learn to let go.
  • 00:02:10.220 --> 00:02:13.040
  • Everybody say, let it go. - Let it go.
  • 00:02:13.040 --> 00:02:15.070
  • - All right, all right.
  • 00:02:15.070 --> 00:02:16.220
  • Number 14, if their parents or family are overly involved
  • 00:02:16.220 --> 00:02:21.140
  • in controlling in every decision he or she makes.
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  • When you marry a guy, you marry his family too.
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  • When you marry a girl you marry into her family, too.
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  • I'm thankful for my in-laws,
  • 00:02:34.230 --> 00:02:36.000
  • but I think about so many relationships
  • 00:02:36.000 --> 00:02:38.190
  • where the parents or the family was just overly involved.
  • 00:02:38.190 --> 00:02:42.290
  • Pay attention to those things, those are red flags.
  • 00:02:42.290 --> 00:02:45.290
  • And listen, if you're 14 years old, and you're like, "My mom
  • 00:02:45.290 --> 00:02:48.150
  • "and dad won't let me do what I wanna do,"
  • 00:02:48.150 --> 00:02:50.060
  • you are under their rule, okay?
  • 00:02:50.060 --> 00:02:53.220
  • Like, of course, they're paying the bills for you,
  • 00:02:53.220 --> 00:02:55.270
  • they're putting a roof over your head,
  • 00:02:55.270 --> 00:02:57.150
  • but if you are 35 years old,
  • 00:02:57.150 --> 00:02:59.260
  • and mommy and daddy are making every single decision for you
  • 00:03:01.120 --> 00:03:05.020
  • and older brother, older sister
  • 00:03:05.020 --> 00:03:06.230
  • are making every decision for you,
  • 00:03:06.230 --> 00:03:08.040
  • and you can't make a decision for yourself,
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  • that is failure to launch.
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  • We gotta put on our big-boy pants, graduate from diapers
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  • and start making decisions for ourselves
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  • and stop letting everyone, you know.
  • 00:03:16.110 --> 00:03:18.140
  • I came to my dad when I was 23,
  • 00:03:18.140 --> 00:03:21.060
  • and I told my dad, "I like Ashley."
  • 00:03:21.060 --> 00:03:23.020
  • And I said, "I like Ashley,"
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  • he said, "Yeah, that's great,
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  • "I do too, I think she's a great girl."
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  • And I said, "Dad, I'm thinking about marrying her.
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  • "What do you think?"
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  • And he said, "I'm glad you asked for my advice,
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  • "that's all I'm gonna give you.
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  • "At the end of the day, it's your decision."
  • 00:03:33.250 --> 00:03:35.030
  • So he gave me his advice, he said,
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  • "Yes, I think she's a great girl,
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  • "I think you guys need to continue to grow
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  • "in these areas in your life."
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  • He was very wise, it was a lot of good truth,
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  • but he was not controlling, he was not controlling.
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  • There's a difference between giving wisdom
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  • and trying to control every decision
  • 00:03:47.000 --> 00:03:48.250
  • that a child makes when they're a are grown adults.
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  • And so my dad said, "Paul, your mom and I will pray for you,
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  • "we will be there for you, but at the end of the day,
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  • "we cannot decide for you what's best for you,
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  • "you've gotta make a decision.
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  • "You are a grown up now,
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  • "so we trust that you'll hear our advice,
  • 00:04:02.250 --> 00:04:05.180
  • "you're listening to God, you're reading books,
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  • "you're gonna grow, you're gonna make wise decisions."
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  • Okay, number 15, when they want to hide
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  • a lot of stuff from you,
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  • and I'm talking like they're hiding their money status,
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  • "Hey, can we talk about what your school loans are?"
  • 00:04:17.190 --> 00:04:20.000
  • Like, "No, I'm not gonna talk about that
  • 00:04:20.000 --> 00:04:21.190
  • "until we're married."
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  • "Can we talk about the credit card debt?"
  • 00:04:22.250 --> 00:04:24.150
  • "No, we're not gonna talk about that till we're married.
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  • "I don't wanna talk about that stuff."
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  • "Can we talk about this addiction?"
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  • "Nope, not good."
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  • If there's a lot of hidden stuff,
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  • and they're not wanting to talk about it,
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  • at some point, it's going to affect the future marriage.
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  • Now, if you are married today,
  • 00:04:39.290 --> 00:04:41.200
  • and you married into some stuff
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  • that was hidden from you while you were dating,
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  • at this point, the best thing we can do
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  • is fight to stay together to work through it,
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  • go to counseling, get stronger,
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  • get free of whatever that stuff that was hidden from before,
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  • don't take this message as I'm leaving my husband,
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  • I'm leaving, listen, if there's some stuff
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  • that needs to be addressed, address it.
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  • But there's a lot of people that will look at relationships
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  • and there's hidden stuff, and they know it,
  • 00:05:04.140 --> 00:05:06.220
  • and they'll put on their blindfold, right,
  • 00:05:06.220 --> 00:05:09.110
  • and they'll just say, "I'm not even gonna look at it,
  • 00:05:09.110 --> 00:05:11.030
  • "I don't even wanna know about it.
  • 00:05:11.030 --> 00:05:13.020
  • "I know that I saw some stuff I shouldn't have seen
  • 00:05:13.020 --> 00:05:15.290
  • "that they're hiding from me, but I'm just gonna pretend
  • 00:05:15.290 --> 00:05:18.190
  • "that I didn't see it, we're gonna just keep going
  • 00:05:18.190 --> 00:05:20.080
  • "through this blind date, into a blind marriage,
  • 00:05:20.080 --> 00:05:22.120
  • "and hope that it all works out in the end."
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  • No, you've got to open your eyes, and you gotta see it,
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  • and you gotta address it.
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  • If they're hiding stuff from you now,
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  • it's only going to grow down the road.
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  • Number 16, if they're often critical of you,
  • 00:05:36.120 --> 00:05:39.100
  • like not in a cute teasing way, (chuckles)
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  • I mean, like, they're putting you down
  • 00:05:42.030 --> 00:05:44.040
  • in front of your friends and their friends all the time,
  • 00:05:44.040 --> 00:05:46.220
  • they're demeaning you, and you're like,
  • 00:05:46.220 --> 00:05:48.190
  • Well, I mean, he's just, he's like that,
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  • like, he's really good looking, or she's really hot,
  • 00:05:51.130 --> 00:05:54.120
  • yeah, she does make fun of me a lot and I do feel hurt,
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  • but I just learned to get over it.
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  • She says I'm just overly sensitive.
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  • And yes, she makes fun of me every single day
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  • with all of her friends and my friend,
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  • you need to have a conversation,
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  • you need to have a conversation.
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  • Because this, if it's not addressed,
  • 00:06:09.160 --> 00:06:11.050
  • it turns into verbal abuse.
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  • And someday when you're parents together,
  • 00:06:13.140 --> 00:06:15.100
  • it gets passed on to kids.
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  • Like being critical of someone,
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  • we're all gonna have critiques about each other,
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  • but that doesn't mean you just say everything
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  • that comes to your mind, and you make fun of your spouse
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  • in front of everyone all the time,
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  • or make fun of the person you're dating,
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  • that's not a healthy way to have a relationship.
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  • All right, number 17, they're still in touch
  • 00:06:32.170 --> 00:06:35.270
  • or holding on to stuff from their ex.
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  • (congregation gasping)
  • 00:06:38.200 --> 00:06:42.040
  • (congregation laughs)
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  • I just touched something right now the service, I feel it.
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  • I'm gonna go out into the crowd, don't be scared,
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  • we gotta address this, right?
  • 00:06:53.070 --> 00:06:55.160
  • If you're still holding on to a box of all the notes,
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  • and the necklace, and the little ring, and the pictures,
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  • if you have a folder on your laptop,
  • 00:07:03.230 --> 00:07:05.290
  • of all the messages and emails,
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  • and you haven't deleted that,
  • 00:07:09.110 --> 00:07:10.220
  • and you are in a serious relationship,
  • 00:07:10.220 --> 00:07:12.110
  • or you are married to someone now,
  • 00:07:12.110 --> 00:07:14.130
  • and you are still entertaining these thoughts
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  • and these feelings, and these pictures
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  • and notes from your ex, that is a red flag.
  • 00:07:19.180 --> 00:07:24.180
  • It needs to be talked about,
  • 00:07:25.140 --> 00:07:26.120
  • there needs to be a conversation
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  • before there's an incarceration
  • 00:07:27.280 --> 00:07:29.260
  • from the person who's gonna get super mad and jealous
  • 00:07:29.260 --> 00:07:32.130
  • and do something harmful too.
  • 00:07:32.130 --> 00:07:33.230
  • Listen, there needs to be a conversation.
  • 00:07:33.230 --> 00:07:35.180
  • If you're still holding on to stuff from your ex,
  • 00:07:35.180 --> 00:07:38.170
  • and you're moving forward into a new relationship,
  • 00:07:38.170 --> 00:07:40.160
  • something has not been dealt with in your past.
  • 00:07:40.160 --> 00:07:43.090
  • And I'm not talking about holding on to,
  • 00:07:43.090 --> 00:07:44.220
  • like, if you're in contact with your ex for child support,
  • 00:07:44.220 --> 00:07:47.200
  • that's one thing,
  • 00:07:47.200 --> 00:07:48.250
  • but if you're in contact in a romantic way,
  • 00:07:48.250 --> 00:07:51.040
  • and you're dating someone new,
  • 00:07:51.040 --> 00:07:52.260
  • and you're trying to play both situations here,
  • 00:07:52.260 --> 00:07:55.070
  • that's not healthy.
  • 00:07:55.070 --> 00:07:57.090
  • It's getting quiet in this charismatic church.
  • 00:07:57.090 --> 00:07:59.160
  • (congregation laughs)
  • 00:07:59.160 --> 00:08:00.250
  • Number 18, they have a warped view of God,
  • 00:08:00.250 --> 00:08:04.200
  • the Bible and the church.
  • 00:08:04.200 --> 00:08:06.270
  • I went on a date with a girl in college, who,
  • 00:08:06.270 --> 00:08:10.110
  • it wasn't Ashley, it wasn't my wife,
  • 00:08:11.170 --> 00:08:13.220
  • but this girl, she started to make jokes
  • 00:08:13.220 --> 00:08:16.180
  • about the Holy Spirit,
  • 00:08:16.180 --> 00:08:18.110
  • she started to make jokes about the Bible,
  • 00:08:18.110 --> 00:08:20.230
  • and she started making jokes about our church.
  • 00:08:20.230 --> 00:08:24.150
  • You don't talk about my dad and mama.
  • 00:08:24.150 --> 00:08:27.070
  • You start talking about my mom, it's over.
  • 00:08:27.070 --> 00:08:29.000
  • Like, at first, I was okay with the beginning
  • 00:08:29.000 --> 00:08:31.170
  • but I was feeling something was off.
  • 00:08:31.170 --> 00:08:33.060
  • I was like this just feels wrong.
  • 00:08:33.060 --> 00:08:35.210
  • She was making fun of just different things.
  • 00:08:35.210 --> 00:08:37.230
  • And I'm telling you right now,
  • 00:08:37.230 --> 00:08:39.010
  • a lot of people get into a relationship
  • 00:08:39.010 --> 00:08:40.170
  • where they have the opposite doctrines and theologies,
  • 00:08:40.170 --> 00:08:43.070
  • and down the road, I'm just telling you,
  • 00:08:43.070 --> 00:08:45.080
  • it creates a whole lot of mess for you to think, "Well,
  • 00:08:45.080 --> 00:08:49.010
  • "I'm missionary-dating him,
  • 00:08:49.010 --> 00:08:50.170
  • "eventually, I'm gonna lead them to Christ,
  • 00:08:50.170 --> 00:08:52.140
  • "I'm a missionary to him, he's my mission field right now,
  • 00:08:52.140 --> 00:08:55.100
  • "I'm just trying to get them saved while we continue
  • 00:08:55.100 --> 00:08:57.250
  • "to lay hands on each other and speak in tongues."
  • 00:08:57.250 --> 00:09:01.030
  • I know what you're doing, you're not speaking,
  • 00:09:01.030 --> 00:09:02.220
  • you're having some other tongues going on,
  • 00:09:02.220 --> 00:09:04.250
  • but if they have a warped view, like they come to church,
  • 00:09:06.060 --> 00:09:08.200
  • no, like, "Let's get out here,
  • 00:09:08.200 --> 00:09:09.270
  • "I don't like what he's talking about,
  • 00:09:09.270 --> 00:09:11.030
  • "he's trying to break this up here,
  • 00:09:11.030 --> 00:09:12.100
  • "he's talking about red flags," (chuckles) oh!
  • 00:09:12.100 --> 00:09:15.160
  • If they have a warped view of God,
  • 00:09:18.140 --> 00:09:20.150
  • if like they're here for one hour,
  • 00:09:20.150 --> 00:09:21.210
  • and they're like, "Let's get out of here,
  • 00:09:21.210 --> 00:09:22.190
  • "I just wanna go see a movie,
  • 00:09:22.190 --> 00:09:23.260
  • "I just wanna go watch the Superbowl right now,
  • 00:09:23.260 --> 00:09:25.040
  • "this church stuff is way too boring for me,
  • 00:09:25.040 --> 00:09:26.060
  • "I don't like any of it."
  • 00:09:26.060 --> 00:09:27.180
  • If you're dating them,
  • 00:09:27.180 --> 00:09:28.260
  • you have an option to end the relationship.
  • 00:09:28.260 --> 00:09:31.230
  • Now if you're married, the option is to love them,
  • 00:09:31.230 --> 00:09:35.240
  • to treat them with the love of Christ
  • 00:09:35.240 --> 00:09:37.170
  • and to stand in the truth of God.
  • 00:09:37.170 --> 00:09:40.020
  • The Bible talks about if you're married
  • 00:09:40.020 --> 00:09:41.190
  • to an unbelieving man, an unbelieving woman,
  • 00:09:41.190 --> 00:09:44.000
  • don't just divorce them,
  • 00:09:44.000 --> 00:09:46.050
  • but be a Christ-like servant in the house.
  • 00:09:46.050 --> 00:09:49.050
  • Show them the love of God, and through your actions,
  • 00:09:49.050 --> 00:09:52.060
  • through your love, through your kindness,
  • 00:09:52.060 --> 00:09:54.130
  • through your commitment to God,
  • 00:09:54.130 --> 00:09:56.070
  • there will be a change that happens in their heart.
  • 00:09:56.070 --> 00:09:58.160
  • But listen, if you're dating someone,
  • 00:09:58.160 --> 00:10:00.020
  • and this is happening right now,
  • 00:10:00.020 --> 00:10:01.190
  • and they're just making fun of your relationship with God,
  • 00:10:01.190 --> 00:10:04.100
  • that is a major red flag.
  • 00:10:04.100 --> 00:10:06.100
  • Number 19, if he or she never wants
  • 00:10:06.100 --> 00:10:09.080
  • to be a around their parents or their family.
  • 00:10:09.080 --> 00:10:12.090
  • "Hey, we've been hanging out a lot with my family
  • 00:10:15.040 --> 00:10:17.040
  • "and you've never mentioned,
  • 00:10:17.040 --> 00:10:18.160
  • "we've been dating for nine months,
  • 00:10:18.160 --> 00:10:19.280
  • "you've never even mentioned your parents once,
  • 00:10:19.280 --> 00:10:23.100
  • "you've never even talked about your family.
  • 00:10:23.100 --> 00:10:25.000
  • "We've been together for a long time,
  • 00:10:25.000 --> 00:10:26.220
  • "and now we're grown adults, how come you've never?"
  • 00:10:26.220 --> 00:10:29.210
  • "I don't wanna talk about my family."
  • 00:10:29.210 --> 00:10:32.010
  • Now, it could be for the right reason,
  • 00:10:32.010 --> 00:10:34.000
  • it could be that mom and dad
  • 00:10:34.000 --> 00:10:35.070
  • are running a meth lab at the house
  • 00:10:35.070 --> 00:10:36.160
  • and we just don't wanna go there.
  • 00:10:36.160 --> 00:10:37.210
  • (congregation laughs) No, I'm serious.
  • 00:10:37.210 --> 00:10:39.270
  • Like it could be for the right like, hey, trust me,
  • 00:10:39.270 --> 00:10:42.180
  • we don't need to go home right now,
  • 00:10:42.180 --> 00:10:45.010
  • the police are invading the house right now.
  • 00:10:45.010 --> 00:10:47.070
  • (congregation laughs) Y'all are laughing
  • 00:10:47.070 --> 00:10:48.240
  • but I'm serious right now, I'm serious.
  • 00:10:48.240 --> 00:10:51.170
  • But at least have a conversation about it,
  • 00:10:51.170 --> 00:10:53.270
  • like don't sweep it under the rug
  • 00:10:53.270 --> 00:10:55.080
  • and say, "It's not a big deal,
  • 00:10:55.080 --> 00:10:56.150
  • "just I don't wanna talk about my parents."
  • 00:10:56.150 --> 00:10:58.000
  • If there is problems at home, just address and just say,
  • 00:10:58.000 --> 00:11:00.130
  • "Hey, listen, there's a reason
  • 00:11:00.130 --> 00:11:01.270
  • "why I haven't brought you to my parents.
  • 00:11:01.270 --> 00:11:04.090
  • "There's a lot of things happening.
  • 00:11:04.090 --> 00:11:05.290
  • "I forgive them, I'm choosing to love them,
  • 00:11:05.290 --> 00:11:08.200
  • "but there's some stuff that just,
  • 00:11:08.200 --> 00:11:10.080
  • "that's why we haven't spent a lot of time with them."
  • 00:11:10.080 --> 00:11:13.040
  • At least have a conversation, 'cause without a conversation,
  • 00:11:13.040 --> 00:11:16.080
  • there's all kinds of assumptions, suspicions, questions.
  • 00:11:16.080 --> 00:11:19.080
  • I really like him but his favorite guys
  • 00:11:19.080 --> 00:11:22.270
  • are Charles Manson, Ted Bundy and Adolf Hitler,
  • 00:11:22.270 --> 00:11:25.150
  • and I don't know what to do with that.
  • 00:11:25.150 --> 00:11:27.250
  • And when I looked on his iTunes playlist, it's all intense,
  • 00:11:29.070 --> 00:11:31.210
  • like abusive songs about guys abusing their wives
  • 00:11:31.210 --> 00:11:35.000
  • and just, I think it's gonna work itself out,
  • 00:11:35.000 --> 00:11:37.130
  • we're just gonna keep going.
  • 00:11:37.130 --> 00:11:38.240
  • No, my friends.
  • 00:11:38.240 --> 00:11:40.150
  • - [Announcer] Now you can watch
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  • 00:12:39.120 --> 00:12:42.280
  • - Number 20.
  • 00:12:44.050 --> 00:12:45.170
  • When they have no discipline in their life,
  • 00:12:45.170 --> 00:12:46.280
  • no self control, no restraint,
  • 00:12:46.280 --> 00:12:49.220
  • like if he's starting to touch your leg right now
  • 00:12:49.220 --> 00:12:52.270
  • and you've been dating for a few months, or you're on a date
  • 00:12:52.270 --> 00:12:55.270
  • and he starts to move in places
  • 00:12:55.270 --> 00:12:57.110
  • where you're not super comfortable, and you say
  • 00:12:57.110 --> 00:12:58.260
  • "Hey, can you stop," and he won't stop and he keeps going,
  • 00:12:58.260 --> 00:13:02.050
  • you're like, "Well, Paul, it's not a big deal."
  • 00:13:02.050 --> 00:13:04.170
  • Well, in a few years, it could be some other girl's leg,
  • 00:13:04.170 --> 00:13:08.070
  • it could be someone else.
  • 00:13:08.070 --> 00:13:09.280
  • It there's no self-control, if he can't control his hands,
  • 00:13:09.280 --> 00:13:13.200
  • I'm just telling you, it's a red flag,
  • 00:13:14.250 --> 00:13:16.290
  • have a conversation before there's an incarceration
  • 00:13:16.290 --> 00:13:20.040
  • because again, if he can't be told no,
  • 00:13:20.040 --> 00:13:23.260
  • there was this girl, this happens with girls too,
  • 00:13:25.170 --> 00:13:27.200
  • I went on a date, I keep telling on myself,
  • 00:13:27.200 --> 00:13:29.210
  • I went on a date in college.
  • 00:13:29.210 --> 00:13:31.280
  • It wasn't a date, it was just a hangout, friend time,
  • 00:13:31.280 --> 00:13:34.030
  • this first week of school,
  • 00:13:34.030 --> 00:13:35.170
  • this girl wanted to hang out with me,
  • 00:13:35.170 --> 00:13:36.250
  • we were having our church conference,
  • 00:13:36.250 --> 00:13:37.290
  • annual church conference in August.
  • 00:13:37.290 --> 00:13:39.180
  • TD Jakes was preaching that night, 2004.
  • 00:13:39.180 --> 00:13:41.290
  • She said, "Hey, can I go with you?"
  • 00:13:41.290 --> 00:13:43.030
  • We just met on campus, I said,
  • 00:13:43.030 --> 00:13:44.140
  • "Sure, all of our friends are going."
  • 00:13:44.140 --> 00:13:46.010
  • So she hopped in the car, five of us, we went to church.
  • 00:13:46.010 --> 00:13:48.220
  • The next night, she said, "Can I go with you again?"
  • 00:13:48.220 --> 00:13:50.190
  • It was Bill Winston with someone else, John Bevere,
  • 00:13:50.190 --> 00:13:53.000
  • So sure, three nights in a row.
  • 00:13:53.000 --> 00:13:55.180
  • The fourth night, we had a big youth service,
  • 00:13:55.180 --> 00:13:57.130
  • and I was a youth volunteer, youth leader,
  • 00:13:57.130 --> 00:13:59.100
  • and I was going there to volunteer.
  • 00:13:59.100 --> 00:14:01.040
  • And she had already gotten my number,
  • 00:14:01.040 --> 00:14:03.010
  • my Cricket cell phone number, she sent me a text,
  • 00:14:03.010 --> 00:14:04.290
  • "Hey, can I go with you to the service?"
  • 00:14:04.290 --> 00:14:06.070
  • I said, "Yeah, I'm going to volunteer,
  • 00:14:06.070 --> 00:14:07.240
  • "you're welcome to come," so she came.
  • 00:14:07.240 --> 00:14:10.070
  • And the whole time,
  • 00:14:10.070 --> 00:14:11.140
  • there was a whole lot of red flags popping up
  • 00:14:11.140 --> 00:14:13.040
  • but I just didn't pay attention.
  • 00:14:13.040 --> 00:14:14.280
  • I was so like, she was pretty, she was flirtatious,
  • 00:14:14.280 --> 00:14:18.100
  • I just kind of was enjoying it.
  • 00:14:18.100 --> 00:14:20.070
  • And I'm just saying this right now, in the Bible,
  • 00:14:20.070 --> 00:14:22.260
  • there was characters like Samson and Delilah,
  • 00:14:22.260 --> 00:14:25.020
  • Samson was called by God
  • 00:14:25.020 --> 00:14:26.210
  • to do a certain thing with his life but he pursued Delilah
  • 00:14:26.210 --> 00:14:31.030
  • and Delilah ended up getting the secret to his strength.
  • 00:14:31.030 --> 00:14:34.010
  • Samson story is a tragic story, he ends up losing his eyes
  • 00:14:34.010 --> 00:14:37.110
  • and we're gonna get into it next week,
  • 00:14:37.110 --> 00:14:39.260
  • but it wasn't all Delilah's fault,
  • 00:14:39.260 --> 00:14:44.020
  • there was something inside of Samson
  • 00:14:44.020 --> 00:14:45.200
  • that was enjoying the lust,
  • 00:14:45.200 --> 00:14:47.220
  • he was enjoying the deception,
  • 00:14:47.220 --> 00:14:50.000
  • stop blaming everything on Delilah.
  • 00:14:50.000 --> 00:14:52.040
  • So there was something in me
  • 00:14:52.040 --> 00:14:53.020
  • that was enjoying it that night.
  • 00:14:53.020 --> 00:14:54.170
  • She said, "Hey, can you give me a ride back to campus?"
  • 00:14:54.170 --> 00:14:56.060
  • "Sure," it's right across the street at the youth building
  • 00:14:56.060 --> 00:14:59.020
  • And so I'm driving and she said, "Hey, let's go for a drive,
  • 00:14:59.020 --> 00:15:02.020
  • "let's turn up the music, roll the windows down."
  • 00:15:02.020 --> 00:15:03.250
  • I was like, "Yeah."
  • 00:15:03.250 --> 00:15:05.000
  • And we'll just call her Delilah,
  • 00:15:05.000 --> 00:15:06.040
  • for the story. (congregation laughs)
  • 00:15:06.040 --> 00:15:07.130
  • So Delilah and I were driving down the road,
  • 00:15:07.130 --> 00:15:10.090
  • and she says, "Hey, you keep paying attention to the road."
  • 00:15:10.090 --> 00:15:13.270
  • I was like, "Yeah, 'cause we're driving."
  • 00:15:13.270 --> 00:15:15.070
  • She's like, "Why don't you park over here
  • 00:15:15.070 --> 00:15:16.220
  • "so you can pay attention to me?"
  • 00:15:16.220 --> 00:15:18.130
  • And I was like, "Okay, Delilah."
  • 00:15:18.130 --> 00:15:20.090
  • And so I pulled over in this parking lot
  • 00:15:20.090 --> 00:15:24.060
  • and she leans in and she wanted to be physical.
  • 00:15:24.060 --> 00:15:29.060
  • And we had only known each other three days
  • 00:15:30.120 --> 00:15:31.190
  • and I felt very uncomfortable
  • 00:15:31.190 --> 00:15:33.200
  • And I was trying to figure out what to do
  • 00:15:33.200 --> 00:15:35.020
  • because at the same time, I'm a dude,
  • 00:15:35.020 --> 00:15:38.040
  • I'm not an angel, I'm a dude.
  • 00:15:38.040 --> 00:15:40.260
  • And thank God in that moment,
  • 00:15:40.260 --> 00:15:44.020
  • I was able to practice self-control.
  • 00:15:44.020 --> 00:15:46.130
  • And I said, "Hey, we need to go back to campus."
  • 00:15:46.130 --> 00:15:49.010
  • She was like, "Why, let's just stay here tonight,
  • 00:15:49.010 --> 00:15:51.150
  • "we can camp out in your car."
  • 00:15:51.150 --> 00:15:54.070
  • (laughs)
  • 00:15:54.070 --> 00:15:56.090
  • And so long story short, drove back to campus,
  • 00:15:57.140 --> 00:16:00.270
  • I said, "Hey, I think we need
  • 00:16:00.270 --> 00:16:03.010
  • "to maybe just take a break from hanging out."
  • 00:16:03.010 --> 00:16:04.220
  • She was like, "Why do you always do this?"
  • 00:16:04.220 --> 00:16:06.050
  • I was like, "Why do I,
  • 00:16:06.050 --> 00:16:07.140
  • "you've known me three days,
  • 00:16:07.140 --> 00:16:08.220
  • "what do you mean why do I always do this?"
  • 00:16:08.220 --> 00:16:10.150
  • She's like, "You always do this, you never let us hang out."
  • 00:16:10.150 --> 00:16:12.170
  • I was like, "What, we've known each other just three days,
  • 00:16:12.170 --> 00:16:14.220
  • "why are you throwing always and never in here?"
  • 00:16:14.220 --> 00:16:17.030
  • And went on to be a very intense,
  • 00:16:17.030 --> 00:16:19.220
  • this girl ended up getting a lot of guys,
  • 00:16:19.220 --> 00:16:21.160
  • breaking a lot of guys' hearts,
  • 00:16:21.160 --> 00:16:23.240
  • crossing a lot of boundaries,
  • 00:16:23.240 --> 00:16:25.000
  • left the school and just a wake of,
  • 00:16:25.000 --> 00:16:27.210
  • there was guys that came to me afterwards they said,
  • 00:16:27.210 --> 00:16:29.150
  • "Did you know about this girl?"
  • 00:16:29.150 --> 00:16:30.190
  • I said, "Yeah."
  • 00:16:30.190 --> 00:16:31.250
  • They said, "Why didn't you warn me?
  • 00:16:31.250 --> 00:16:33.080
  • "Like, why didn't you tell me
  • 00:16:33.080 --> 00:16:35.030
  • "there was red flags around this girl?"
  • 00:16:35.030 --> 00:16:37.100
  • And I said, "I honestly wasn't sure, I just didn't know."
  • 00:16:37.100 --> 00:16:42.030
  • But I feel like I'm preaching this sermon
  • 00:16:42.030 --> 00:16:43.200
  • to some singles right now.
  • 00:16:43.200 --> 00:16:45.170
  • That there's some guys and some girls
  • 00:16:45.170 --> 00:16:47.290
  • that God is still working on.
  • 00:16:47.290 --> 00:16:50.000
  • I'm not saying they're a lost cause,
  • 00:16:50.000 --> 00:16:52.140
  • I'm just saying there's a red flag on the beach right now.
  • 00:16:52.140 --> 00:16:55.190
  • And you don't realize there's undercurrents
  • 00:16:55.190 --> 00:16:57.240
  • and you think you can be a missionary dater
  • 00:16:57.240 --> 00:17:00.030
  • and lead them to Christ,
  • 00:17:00.030 --> 00:17:01.160
  • and God is saying, "Let me lead them to Christ.
  • 00:17:01.160 --> 00:17:03.240
  • "Let me be their Savior.
  • 00:17:03.240 --> 00:17:05.100
  • "You can't be his Savior, you can't be her Savior."
  • 00:17:05.100 --> 00:17:07.210
  • All right, I gotta hurry up here.
  • 00:17:07.210 --> 00:17:09.260
  • Number 21, when all their heroes and favorite shows
  • 00:17:09.260 --> 00:17:12.010
  • and influences are very secular, dark and twisted.
  • 00:17:12.010 --> 00:17:15.120
  • (laughs)
  • 00:17:15.120 --> 00:17:17.230
  • I really like him but his favorite guys are Charles Manson,
  • 00:17:17.230 --> 00:17:22.100
  • Ted Bundy and Adolf Hitler,
  • 00:17:22.100 --> 00:17:23.260
  • and I, I don't know what to do with that.
  • 00:17:23.260 --> 00:17:26.060
  • And when I looked on his iTunes playlist, it's all intense,
  • 00:17:27.180 --> 00:17:30.030
  • like abusive songs about guys abusing their wives
  • 00:17:30.030 --> 00:17:33.120
  • and just, I think it's gonna work itself out,
  • 00:17:33.120 --> 00:17:35.250
  • we're just gonna keep going.
  • 00:17:35.250 --> 00:17:37.060
  • No, my friends.
  • 00:17:37.060 --> 00:17:39.080
  • If everything that he likes
  • 00:17:39.080 --> 00:17:41.090
  • is messed up and dark and twisted, have a conversation.
  • 00:17:41.090 --> 00:17:45.110
  • If he just idolizes serial killers,
  • 00:17:45.110 --> 00:17:48.160
  • I'm just saying that's a red flag,
  • 00:17:48.160 --> 00:17:49.290
  • I'm just saying, I'm just saying.
  • 00:17:49.290 --> 00:17:51.200
  • Number 22, when he says, I'll stay with you,
  • 00:17:51.200 --> 00:17:54.290
  • if you do this for me,
  • 00:17:54.290 --> 00:17:56.230
  • and it's something that compromises your boundaries,
  • 00:17:56.230 --> 00:18:00.020
  • that's a red flag.
  • 00:18:00.020 --> 00:18:01.090
  • If you have to sleep with him to keep him,
  • 00:18:01.090 --> 00:18:03.110
  • he's not the one for you.
  • 00:18:03.110 --> 00:18:05.090
  • And I'm just saying that like,
  • 00:18:05.090 --> 00:18:06.270
  • because sex is good inside the covenant of marriage,
  • 00:18:06.270 --> 00:18:09.130
  • sex is amazing, but outside the covenant of marriage,
  • 00:18:09.130 --> 00:18:12.190
  • God says, "That's not right."
  • 00:18:12.190 --> 00:18:14.070
  • And if he's saying,
  • 00:18:14.070 --> 00:18:15.130
  • "You gotta do this in order to keep me,"
  • 00:18:15.130 --> 00:18:17.000
  • (sighs) that's a red flag.
  • 00:18:17.000 --> 00:18:19.050
  • Number 23, if you're getting warnings
  • 00:18:19.050 --> 00:18:21.100
  • from all the right people.
  • 00:18:21.100 --> 00:18:23.120
  • Stop calling people haters in your life that love you.
  • 00:18:23.120 --> 00:18:26.090
  • "Those haters, they don't even want me to be with you.
  • 00:18:27.220 --> 00:18:29.180
  • "Those haters keep telling us we need to break up.
  • 00:18:29.180 --> 00:18:31.200
  • "That Pastor Paul, he's a hater, talking about red flags,
  • 00:18:31.200 --> 00:18:34.130
  • "don't listen to him, they're haters," stop.
  • 00:18:34.130 --> 00:18:36.250
  • Like there's good people in your life that love you
  • 00:18:36.250 --> 00:18:38.170
  • that are saying, "We're not saying
  • 00:18:38.170 --> 00:18:39.220
  • "you can never date each other,
  • 00:18:39.220 --> 00:18:40.290
  • "we're just saying maybe right now,
  • 00:18:40.290 --> 00:18:42.150
  • "there's some things that need to be changed.
  • 00:18:42.150 --> 00:18:44.040
  • "Let's get in the men's discipleship track,
  • 00:18:44.040 --> 00:18:45.230
  • "let's get in the women's, let's go to the walk it out,
  • 00:18:45.230 --> 00:18:48.000
  • "let's start getting some things right in our life,
  • 00:18:48.000 --> 00:18:49.240
  • "let's develop some healthy habits."
  • 00:18:49.240 --> 00:18:53.020
  • Number 24, if you still have feelings for someone else,
  • 00:18:53.020 --> 00:18:57.150
  • or he or she still has feelings for someone else,
  • 00:18:57.150 --> 00:19:00.130
  • it's probably not the best time
  • 00:19:00.130 --> 00:19:01.250
  • to enter into a very serious relationship,
  • 00:19:01.250 --> 00:19:04.150
  • because they're still dealing with the love and the romance,
  • 00:19:04.150 --> 00:19:07.060
  • and the feelings they have for that person in the past.
  • 00:19:07.060 --> 00:19:09.200
  • And number 25, final point here,
  • 00:19:09.200 --> 00:19:11.120
  • when you have a very unhealthy amount of doubt.
  • 00:19:11.120 --> 00:19:14.150
  • You can't sleep at night, your cold sweat,
  • 00:19:14.150 --> 00:19:16.110
  • it's scaring you, can't even work, can't even think
  • 00:19:16.110 --> 00:19:20.090
  • that's a red flag, not meaning that it can never happen,
  • 00:19:20.090 --> 00:19:23.060
  • just mean right now you need to stop and pray,
  • 00:19:23.060 --> 00:19:25.230
  • and maybe just seek some wise counsel in your life.
  • 00:19:25.230 --> 00:19:28.160
  • All right, you can breathe now, the 25 red flags are over.
  • 00:19:28.160 --> 00:19:32.020
  • You're still here, you're still alive.
  • 00:19:32.020 --> 00:19:34.030
  • Not everybody got up and left and went to the bathroom.
  • 00:19:34.030 --> 00:19:36.250
  • Let me finish this with this last thought.
  • 00:19:38.020 --> 00:19:39.210
  • I think this is the most important part
  • 00:19:39.210 --> 00:19:40.280
  • of the sermon right here.
  • 00:19:40.280 --> 00:19:41.230
  • What do I do?
  • 00:19:41.230 --> 00:19:42.270
  • Now, that I know there's red flags here,
  • 00:19:42.270 --> 00:19:44.150
  • and married people, I'm coming for you next week,
  • 00:19:44.150 --> 00:19:46.250
  • I'm coming for the couples in the room, me too,
  • 00:19:46.250 --> 00:19:49.210
  • I've got some stuff that we need to talk about.
  • 00:19:49.210 --> 00:19:52.040
  • But for singles in the room,
  • 00:19:52.040 --> 00:19:53.110
  • start with yourself, start with you.
  • 00:19:53.110 --> 00:19:56.050
  • Instead of looking at the speck in everyone else's eyes,
  • 00:19:56.050 --> 00:19:58.150
  • start with the log in you, what is some red flags that,
  • 00:19:58.150 --> 00:20:01.200
  • I'm starting with the man in the mirror.
  • 00:20:01.200 --> 00:20:03.200
  • So now that I know there's red flags out there
  • 00:20:03.200 --> 00:20:05.110
  • I'm looking is there some in me?
  • 00:20:05.110 --> 00:20:07.020
  • Number two, stop blaming it all on Delilah.
  • 00:20:07.020 --> 00:20:10.080
  • Like own the fact that there could be some things in you
  • 00:20:10.080 --> 00:20:12.270
  • that are enjoying being around this person with red flag.
  • 00:20:12.270 --> 00:20:15.160
  • It could be that your red flags
  • 00:20:15.160 --> 00:20:17.000
  • are connecting with their red flags,
  • 00:20:17.000 --> 00:20:18.240
  • and there needs to be some red flags from God
  • 00:20:18.240 --> 00:20:20.230
  • that says, let's separate for a season,
  • 00:20:20.230 --> 00:20:22.270
  • let's get things right,
  • 00:20:22.270 --> 00:20:24.040
  • let's take some time to seek the Lord.
  • 00:20:24.040 --> 00:20:26.040
  • You go to church together,
  • 00:20:26.040 --> 00:20:27.110
  • go to discipleship class together,
  • 00:20:27.110 --> 00:20:29.010
  • push pause for a second while you're dating.
  • 00:20:29.010 --> 00:20:31.100
  • And number three, address the mess.
  • 00:20:31.100 --> 00:20:33.140
  • If there's smoke, don't wait for the fire.
  • 00:20:33.140 --> 00:20:36.170
  • I tell this to our staff members,
  • 00:20:36.170 --> 00:20:38.220
  • especially working with our youth and our kids,
  • 00:20:38.220 --> 00:20:41.000
  • if you smell smoke from a volunteer,
  • 00:20:41.000 --> 00:20:43.100
  • don't wait for the fire,
  • 00:20:43.100 --> 00:20:44.250
  • don't wait till I get a phone call from a police officer.
  • 00:20:44.250 --> 00:20:47.110
  • I wanna address the smoke.
  • 00:20:47.110 --> 00:20:48.270
  • The second there's smoke, we need to deal with the mess,
  • 00:20:48.270 --> 00:20:51.160
  • we need to stop pretending like it's not there.
  • 00:20:51.160 --> 00:20:53.150
  • Let's stop closing our eyes
  • 00:20:53.150 --> 00:20:55.000
  • and hoping that nothing bad happens.
  • 00:20:55.000 --> 00:20:56.240
  • Let's deal with the mess.
  • 00:20:56.240 --> 00:20:58.170
  • Number four, get rooted in God's house.
  • 00:20:58.170 --> 00:21:01.240
  • Be faithful somewhere, be faithful somewhere,
  • 00:21:01.240 --> 00:21:04.230
  • lean in, choose to commit to a church
  • 00:21:04.230 --> 00:21:07.060
  • and go when it's not easy, go when you don't like it,
  • 00:21:07.060 --> 00:21:10.130
  • develop consistency in God's house,
  • 00:21:10.130 --> 00:21:12.240
  • develop faithfulness there.
  • 00:21:12.240 --> 00:21:14.050
  • Number five, get wisdom,
  • 00:21:14.050 --> 00:21:15.250
  • get wisdom from God's Word, God's people, godly mentors.
  • 00:21:15.250 --> 00:21:19.160
  • If you're 17 years old, and all the wisdom you're getting
  • 00:21:19.160 --> 00:21:22.050
  • is from your peers, go to someone who's twice your age,
  • 00:21:22.050 --> 00:21:26.110
  • who's lived a little bit longer than you,
  • 00:21:26.110 --> 00:21:28.240
  • go to some of these amazing, mighty men and women of God
  • 00:21:28.240 --> 00:21:32.010
  • that have been married for 20, 30, 40, 50 years,
  • 00:21:32.010 --> 00:21:34.240
  • go to gran gran and just say,
  • 00:21:34.240 --> 00:21:36.090
  • "Hey, can you give me some wisdom as I'm a single girl,
  • 00:21:36.090 --> 00:21:38.190
  • "single guy, trying to do it right,
  • 00:21:38.190 --> 00:21:40.090
  • "trying to have a healthy relationship."
  • 00:21:40.090 --> 00:21:42.000
  • Don't just get wisdom from your peers,
  • 00:21:42.000 --> 00:21:43.180
  • go get wisdom from godly mentors.
  • 00:21:43.180 --> 00:21:46.010
  • Number six, set boundaries for who you will date
  • 00:21:46.010 --> 00:21:48.180
  • and how you will date, set boundaries for the kind of guy
  • 00:21:48.180 --> 00:21:51.220
  • that you're gonna date.
  • 00:21:51.220 --> 00:21:53.070
  • Set boundaries for the kind of girl that you're gonna date,
  • 00:21:53.070 --> 00:21:55.060
  • set boundaries for how you're going to date them.
  • 00:21:55.060 --> 00:21:58.010
  • Not just who you will date, but how you will date.
  • 00:21:58.010 --> 00:21:59.270
  • We're not gonna have sex till we get married.
  • 00:21:59.270 --> 00:22:02.070
  • That's so old-fashioned Paul.
  • 00:22:02.070 --> 00:22:03.240
  • No, it's the Bible,
  • 00:22:03.240 --> 00:22:05.100
  • the one who created sex is the one who said this.
  • 00:22:05.100 --> 00:22:07.260
  • And I think he's got the right to say it
  • 00:22:07.260 --> 00:22:10.010
  • more than 50 Shades of Grey or Magic Mike,
  • 00:22:10.010 --> 00:22:12.010
  • I think God's the one
  • 00:22:12.010 --> 00:22:13.160
  • that knows what's best for our sex life and our love life.
  • 00:22:13.160 --> 00:22:16.140
  • Set boundaries that are gonna bring God glory
  • 00:22:16.140 --> 00:22:19.130
  • and gonna help you have healthy non-toxic relationships.
  • 00:22:19.130 --> 00:22:23.070
  • Number seven, start serving.
  • 00:22:23.070 --> 00:22:25.160
  • Why would you expect someone
  • 00:22:25.160 --> 00:22:26.230
  • to have a servant's heart in marriage
  • 00:22:26.230 --> 00:22:28.050
  • that's not serving anywhere right now?
  • 00:22:28.050 --> 00:22:31.050
  • And why do you think you could be
  • 00:22:31.050 --> 00:22:32.150
  • a great servant leader in marriage
  • 00:22:32.150 --> 00:22:34.060
  • when you aren't serving anywhere
  • 00:22:34.060 --> 00:22:35.260
  • and haven't served anywhere in a very long time?
  • 00:22:35.260 --> 00:22:38.060
  • Get involved, help people out, open the door,
  • 00:22:38.060 --> 00:22:40.120
  • go help out at the soup kitchen downtown,
  • 00:22:40.120 --> 00:22:42.070
  • go serve at Salvation Army,
  • 00:22:42.070 --> 00:22:43.200
  • go serve somewhere, get involved,
  • 00:22:43.200 --> 00:22:45.160
  • give out, be generous, help others.
  • 00:22:45.160 --> 00:22:48.010
  • And finally, right here number eight,
  • 00:22:48.010 --> 00:22:49.160
  • go on dates with godly girls and guys.
  • 00:22:49.160 --> 00:22:52.100
  • I had someone come up to me after the last service,
  • 00:22:52.100 --> 00:22:54.190
  • Saturday night service, and they said,
  • 00:22:54.190 --> 00:22:56.100
  • "I'm scared I'm gonna end up
  • 00:22:56.100 --> 00:22:57.240
  • "dating Ted Bundy or Charles Manson
  • 00:22:57.240 --> 00:23:00.030
  • "and now I don't even wanna go on dates."
  • 00:23:00.030 --> 00:23:02.030
  • And I said "No, don't be afraid,
  • 00:23:02.030 --> 00:23:04.040
  • "Like there's good godly guys out there,
  • 00:23:04.040 --> 00:23:06.020
  • "there's good godly girls."
  • 00:23:06.020 --> 00:23:07.160
  • So go on some dates.
  • 00:23:07.160 --> 00:23:09.010
  • If you're grown up, go.
  • 00:23:09.010 --> 00:23:10.220
  • This is not a series to say I kissed dating goodbye,
  • 00:23:10.220 --> 00:23:12.290
  • this is a series to say I'm giving godly dating a chance.
  • 00:23:12.290 --> 00:23:17.100
  • Hey, maybe you've been in a relationship
  • 00:23:17.100 --> 00:23:19.050
  • where there's been some red flags.
  • 00:23:19.050 --> 00:23:20.240
  • Maybe as you were listening to the sermon,
  • 00:23:20.240 --> 00:23:22.160
  • you were laughing and also thinking to yourself,
  • 00:23:22.160 --> 00:23:24.290
  • My goodness, that's been me before,
  • 00:23:24.290 --> 00:23:27.070
  • I've had those red flags,
  • 00:23:27.070 --> 00:23:28.290
  • or I've dated someone with those red flags.
  • 00:23:28.290 --> 00:23:31.130
  • I wanna encourage you with this,
  • 00:23:31.130 --> 00:23:32.290
  • that no matter what kind of stuff
  • 00:23:32.290 --> 00:23:34.150
  • you've walked through in your past,
  • 00:23:34.150 --> 00:23:35.290
  • no matter what relationships haven't worked out,
  • 00:23:35.290 --> 00:23:38.160
  • God still has a plan for your life, God has a purpose.
  • 00:23:38.160 --> 00:23:41.000
  • Whether you're single, or married, or divorced,
  • 00:23:41.000 --> 00:23:43.100
  • God wants you to have a healthy relationship
  • 00:23:43.100 --> 00:23:45.230
  • with the person that you love,
  • 00:23:45.230 --> 00:23:47.080
  • God wants you to have a healthy marriage someday,
  • 00:23:47.080 --> 00:23:49.210
  • God wants you to be able to prosper in your relationships,
  • 00:23:49.210 --> 00:23:52.050
  • to thrive and not just survive, not just barely get by,
  • 00:23:52.050 --> 00:23:55.280
  • God wants you to be able to move past suspicion
  • 00:23:55.280 --> 00:23:58.210
  • and into a place of trust, to move past jealousy,
  • 00:23:58.210 --> 00:24:01.200
  • to move past bitterness, hurts, offense, anger, pride,
  • 00:24:01.200 --> 00:24:05.250
  • God wants our hearts to get out of the red flags zone
  • 00:24:05.250 --> 00:24:08.290
  • and to come into a place of peace,
  • 00:24:08.290 --> 00:24:10.240
  • that we would be healthy on the inside.
  • 00:24:10.240 --> 00:24:12.250
  • So pray this prayer with me right now
  • 00:24:12.250 --> 00:24:14.090
  • and just say, Jesus, start with me, start with my heart.
  • 00:24:14.090 --> 00:24:18.220
  • Lord, help me to grow into who you've called me to be,
  • 00:24:18.220 --> 00:24:22.050
  • so that I can be a healthy person
  • 00:24:22.050 --> 00:24:24.100
  • from the inside out, spiritually healthy,
  • 00:24:24.100 --> 00:24:26.260
  • in Jesus name, amen.
  • 00:24:26.260 --> 00:24:28.220
  • I believe God's gonna help you with that.
  • 00:24:28.220 --> 00:24:30.210
  • Just like you heard in the sermon, that oftentimes,
  • 00:24:30.210 --> 00:24:33.020
  • we try to close our eyes,
  • 00:24:33.020 --> 00:24:34.180
  • or we're more concerned with fixing someone else,
  • 00:24:34.180 --> 00:24:37.000
  • let's start with us first.
  • 00:24:37.000 --> 00:24:38.070
  • Every single day, just ask God to help you grow
  • 00:24:38.070 --> 00:24:41.000
  • into who he's called you to be.
  • 00:24:41.000 --> 00:24:42.240
  • Hey, we're here for you.
  • 00:24:42.240 --> 00:24:44.010
  • This whole series is online at victory.com.
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  • If you're ever in Tulsa, come to Victory,
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  • We'll make you feel right at home.
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  • Again, never forget your best days
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  • are right in front of you.
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