Sarah Mae | The Complicated Heart | TBN

Sarah Mae | The Complicated Heart

Watch Sarah Mae | The Complicated Heart
October 7, 2019
27:34

Life Today with James Robison

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Sarah Mae | The Complicated Heart

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  • SARAH MAE EXPLAINS HOW SHE LEARNED
  • 00:00:06.170 --> 00:00:08.120
  • TO LOVE AND FORGIVE HER ALCOHOLIC MOTHER.
  • 00:00:08.150 --> 00:00:11.110
  • - SHE WAS PHYSICAL SOMETIMES,
  • 00:00:11.140 --> 00:00:12.290
  • BUT IT WAS MOSTLY JUST THE FACT THAT SHE WAS BRILLIANT
  • 00:00:13.020 --> 00:00:15.270
  • AT SARCASM AND CUTTING YOU DOWN
  • 00:00:16.000 --> 00:00:18.210
  • UNTIL YOU FELT LIKE YOU WERE ABSOLUTELY CRAZY.
  • 00:00:18.240 --> 00:00:21.050
  • I CAN REMEMBER ONE TIME I WAS VERY AFRAID
  • 00:00:21.080 --> 00:00:24.240
  • AND I WENT TO TELL HER.
  • 00:00:24.270 --> 00:00:26.220
  • AND I SOMEHOW GOT THE WORDS OUT,
  • 00:00:26.250 --> 00:00:28.290
  • "MOM, I THINK YOU'RE AN ALCOHOLIC."
  • 00:00:29.020 --> 00:00:31.050
  • SHE SAID, "SO WHAT?"
  • 00:00:31.080 --> 00:00:33.060
  • THE COMPLICATED HEART. NEXT!
  • 00:00:33.090 --> 00:00:35.280
  • 00:00:42.240 --> 00:00:49.190
  • James: THANK YOU!
  • 00:00:55.260 --> 00:00:58.260
  • ALL OF YOU,
  • 00:00:58.260 --> 00:01:00.100
  • YOU HELP BETTY AND ME SMILE
  • 00:01:00.100 --> 00:01:01.260
  • BECAUSE YOU'RE
  • 00:01:01.260 --> 00:01:03.030
  • A WONDERFUL AUDIENCE.
  • 00:01:03.030 --> 00:01:04.110
  • WE JUST WELCOME YOU.
  • 00:01:04.110 --> 00:01:05.140
  • BETTY AND I ARE THRILLED
  • 00:01:06.180 --> 00:01:07.200
  • TO HAVE THIS OPPORTUNITY
  • 00:01:07.200 --> 00:01:08.240
  • TO SPEND TIME WITH YOU.
  • 00:01:08.240 --> 00:01:09.260
  • LET ME JUST SAY THIS TO YOU
  • 00:01:09.260 --> 00:01:10.290
  • THAT YOU REALLY ARE
  • 00:01:10.290 --> 00:01:12.020
  • VERY SPECIAL.
  • 00:01:12.020 --> 00:01:13.120
  • YOU WILL FIND THAT AS YOU
  • 00:01:13.120 --> 00:01:14.270
  • LISTEN TO AN INCREDIBLE STORY
  • 00:01:14.270 --> 00:01:17.160
  • BY SARAH MAE AND HER JOURNEY,
  • 00:01:17.160 --> 00:01:19.230
  • IT IS TITLED,
  • 00:01:19.230 --> 00:01:21.000
  • THE COMPLICATED HEART .
  • 00:01:21.000 --> 00:01:22.000
  • WOULD YOU WELCOME SARAH MAE?
  • 00:01:22.000 --> 00:01:24.020
  • Sarah: THANK YOU!
  • 00:01:24.020 --> 00:01:26.140
  • James: SARAH, YOU'VE ALREADY
  • 00:01:26.140 --> 00:01:29.130
  • TOLD SOME OF YOUR STORY.
  • 00:01:29.130 --> 00:01:30.250
  • YOU'RE A GREAT COMMUNICATOR.
  • 00:01:30.250 --> 00:01:32.270
  • I KNOW YOU GO AND SPEAK NOW
  • 00:01:32.270 --> 00:01:34.140
  • IN DIFFERENT PLACES.
  • 00:01:34.140 --> 00:01:35.180
  • IF SOMEBODY WANTED
  • 00:01:35.180 --> 00:01:36.190
  • TO ACCESS YOUR WEBSITE
  • 00:01:36.190 --> 00:01:37.190
  • TO SAY HOW WOULD WE GET SARAH,
  • 00:01:37.190 --> 00:01:40.020
  • PERHAPS TO COME AND HELP US
  • 00:01:40.020 --> 00:01:41.070
  • WHERE WOULD THEY GO?
  • 00:01:42.130 --> 00:01:43.170
  • Sarah: THANK YOU FOR ASKING.
  • 00:01:43.170 --> 00:01:44.220
  • YOU WOULD GO TO SARAHMAE.COM
  • 00:01:44.220 --> 00:01:45.270
  • WHICH IS S-A-R-A-H-M-A-E.COM.
  • 00:01:45.270 --> 00:01:48.120
  • James: DO YOU GO AND SPEAK
  • 00:01:48.120 --> 00:01:49.270
  • IN DIFFERENT PLACES
  • 00:01:49.270 --> 00:01:51.020
  • WHEN YOU SEE THE DOOR OPEN
  • 00:01:51.020 --> 00:01:52.030
  • THAT YOU KNOW IT IS
  • 00:01:52.030 --> 00:01:53.080
  • THE APPROPRIATE PLACE TO GO?
  • 00:01:53.080 --> 00:01:54.110
  • Sarah: I DO!
  • 00:01:54.110 --> 00:01:55.160
  • I REALLY ENJOY IT.
  • 00:01:55.160 --> 00:01:56.180
  • I ALSO SPEAK THROUGH --
  • 00:01:56.180 --> 00:01:57.220
  • I HAVE A PODCAST
  • 00:01:57.220 --> 00:01:58.240
  • SO PEOPLE CAN FIND THAT AT
  • 00:01:58.240 --> 00:02:00.020
  • THECOMPLICATEDHEART PODCAST.
  • 00:02:00.020 --> 00:02:01.070
  • BUT YEAH, I DO, I LOVE IT.
  • 00:02:02.130 --> 00:02:03.240
  • James: I WANT YOU TO JUST
  • 00:02:03.240 --> 00:02:05.040
  • CARRY US THROUGH THE JOURNEY
  • 00:02:05.040 --> 00:02:06.170
  • THAT YOU WANT US TO SEE
  • 00:02:06.170 --> 00:02:08.010
  • BECAUSE SO MANY PEOPLE
  • 00:02:08.010 --> 00:02:09.210
  • HAVE BEEN HURT.
  • 00:02:09.210 --> 00:02:11.120
  • I THINK SOMETIMES
  • 00:02:11.120 --> 00:02:12.180
  • WE DON'T REALIZE
  • 00:02:12.180 --> 00:02:14.010
  • HOW DEEPLY PEOPLE ARE HURT.
  • 00:02:14.010 --> 00:02:15.090
  • GOD REALLY WANTS TO GET
  • 00:02:15.090 --> 00:02:16.120
  • HIS ARMS AROUND THE HURTING.
  • 00:02:16.120 --> 00:02:17.170
  • WOULDN'T YOU SAY HE IS
  • 00:02:17.170 --> 00:02:18.230
  • THE ONLY ONE WHO CAN GIVE US
  • 00:02:18.230 --> 00:02:19.260
  • THE COMFORT WE NEED
  • 00:02:19.260 --> 00:02:20.260
  • WHEN OUR HEART HURTS?
  • 00:02:20.260 --> 00:02:21.290
  • TELL US THE STORY
  • 00:02:21.290 --> 00:02:23.050
  • YOU WOULD LIKE OUR VIEWERS
  • 00:02:23.050 --> 00:02:24.090
  • AND EVERYBODY AT HOME
  • 00:02:24.090 --> 00:02:25.140
  • TO HEAR AND SEE.
  • 00:02:25.140 --> 00:02:26.200
  • AND THEN ABOUT HOW
  • 00:02:26.200 --> 00:02:27.260
  • THEY CAN GO INTO THE BOOK
  • 00:02:27.260 --> 00:02:29.000
  • AND REALLY BE CARRIED THROUGH,
  • 00:02:29.000 --> 00:02:30.050
  • I THINK,
  • 00:02:30.050 --> 00:02:31.090
  • TO A REAL PLACE OF HEALING.
  • 00:02:31.090 --> 00:02:32.140
  • Sarah: THAT'S GREAT.
  • 00:02:32.140 --> 00:02:33.210
  • WELL, MY STORY
  • 00:02:33.210 --> 00:02:35.130
  • ESSENTIALLY STARTS
  • 00:02:35.130 --> 00:02:36.280
  • AROUND 14 YEARS OLD
  • 00:02:36.280 --> 00:02:38.040
  • WHEN I MOVE IN WITH MY MOM,
  • 00:02:38.040 --> 00:02:39.140
  • WHO HAPPENS TO BE AN ALCOHOLIC
  • 00:02:39.140 --> 00:02:40.230
  • BUT I DON'T KNOW IT YET.
  • 00:02:40.230 --> 00:02:42.270
  • MY DAD HAD CUSTODY OF ME.
  • 00:02:42.270 --> 00:02:44.130
  • THEY WERE DIVORCED
  • 00:02:44.130 --> 00:02:45.230
  • WHEN I WAS VERY YOUNG.
  • 00:02:45.230 --> 00:02:47.020
  • I WOULD VISIT MY MOM
  • 00:02:47.020 --> 00:02:48.060
  • IN THE SUMMERS
  • 00:02:48.060 --> 00:02:49.110
  • SHE WAS FANTASTIC.
  • 00:02:50.160 --> 00:02:51.200
  • JUST SO FUN AND WONDERFUL.
  • 00:02:51.200 --> 00:02:52.240
  • BUT WHEN I MOVED IN WITH HER
  • 00:02:52.240 --> 00:02:53.270
  • BECAUSE I FELT LIKE A GIRL
  • 00:02:53.270 --> 00:02:55.000
  • IT WAS NOT WHAT I EXPECTED.
  • 00:02:56.290 --> 00:02:58.240
  • IT STARTED OUT FANTASTIC.
  • 00:02:58.240 --> 00:03:00.040
  • I HAD NO RULES.
  • 00:03:00.040 --> 00:03:01.060
  • I COULD DO WHATEVER I WANTED,
  • 00:03:01.060 --> 00:03:02.230
  • WHICH IS SORT OF
  • 00:03:02.230 --> 00:03:04.030
  • A TEENAGER'S DREAM, RIGHT?
  • 00:03:04.030 --> 00:03:05.130
  • IT'S OBVIOUSLY NOT GOOD
  • 00:03:05.130 --> 00:03:07.110
  • BUT TO ME IT WAS FANTASTIC.
  • 00:03:09.140 --> 00:03:12.140
  • THEN I STARTED TO WITNESS
  • 00:03:12.140 --> 00:03:14.090
  • MY MOM DRINKING A LOT.
  • 00:03:14.090 --> 00:03:16.000
  • AND WHEN SHE WOULD DRINK
  • 00:03:16.000 --> 00:03:17.080
  • SHE WOULD JUST GET
  • 00:03:17.080 --> 00:03:18.090
  • VERY, VERY CRUEL.
  • 00:03:18.090 --> 00:03:19.170
  • SO SHE WAS JUST
  • 00:03:19.170 --> 00:03:21.190
  • VERY EMOTIONALLY
  • 00:03:21.190 --> 00:03:23.000
  • AND VERBALLY ABUSIVE.
  • 00:03:23.000 --> 00:03:24.030
  • IF I CAME IN AND SMILED
  • 00:03:24.030 --> 00:03:25.090
  • AT HER, AND HAD BRACES ON,
  • 00:03:25.090 --> 00:03:26.110
  • SHE WOULD TELL ME,
  • 00:03:26.110 --> 00:03:27.150
  • "YOU'RE SO UGLY."
  • 00:03:27.150 --> 00:03:28.290
  • SHE WAS PHYSICAL SOMETIMES
  • 00:03:28.290 --> 00:03:30.210
  • BUT IT WAS MOSTLY
  • 00:03:30.210 --> 00:03:31.290
  • JUST THE FACT THAT
  • 00:03:31.290 --> 00:03:33.040
  • SHE WAS BRILLIANT AT SARCASM
  • 00:03:33.040 --> 00:03:35.120
  • AND CUTTING ME DOWN
  • 00:03:35.120 --> 00:03:36.240
  • UNTIL YOU FELT LIKE
  • 00:03:36.240 --> 00:03:38.010
  • YOU WERE ABSOLUTELY CRAZY.
  • 00:03:38.010 --> 00:03:39.080
  • I CAN REMEMBER ONE TIME
  • 00:03:39.080 --> 00:03:41.060
  • GOING AND CONFRONTING HER
  • 00:03:41.060 --> 00:03:42.150
  • ABOUT BEING AN ALCOHOLIC.
  • 00:03:42.150 --> 00:03:43.210
  • AND OF COURSE,
  • 00:03:43.210 --> 00:03:44.260
  • I WAS ONLY 14 YEARS OLD
  • 00:03:44.260 --> 00:03:46.030
  • SO I HAD NO EXPERIENCE
  • 00:03:46.030 --> 00:03:47.070
  • WITH THIS.
  • 00:03:47.070 --> 00:03:48.140
  • I WAS VERY AFRAID.
  • 00:03:48.140 --> 00:03:49.250
  • I WENT TO TELL HER
  • 00:03:49.250 --> 00:03:51.020
  • AND I SOMEHOW
  • 00:03:51.020 --> 00:03:52.130
  • GOT THE WORDS OUT, "MOM,
  • 00:03:52.130 --> 00:03:53.230
  • I THINK YOU'RE AN ALCOHOLIC."
  • 00:03:53.230 --> 00:03:56.090
  • SHE SAID, "SO WHAT?"
  • 00:03:56.090 --> 00:03:58.240
  • I WAS LIKE WAIT A MINUTE,
  • 00:03:58.240 --> 00:04:00.050
  • THAT'S NOT
  • 00:04:00.050 --> 00:04:01.100
  • WHAT THE SHOWS TELL YOU.
  • 00:04:01.100 --> 00:04:02.150
  • THEY'RE SUPPOSED TO SAY,
  • 00:04:02.150 --> 00:04:04.010
  • "THANK YOU FOR TELLING ME.
  • 00:04:04.010 --> 00:04:05.110
  • I'LL GO GET HELP NOW."
  • 00:04:05.110 --> 00:04:07.230
  • AND SHE DIDN'T.
  • 00:04:07.230 --> 00:04:10.210
  • I CAN REMEMBER SAYING LIKE,
  • 00:04:10.210 --> 00:04:12.090
  • "MOM, WHEN YOU DRINK,
  • 00:04:12.090 --> 00:04:13.140
  • YOU GET REALLY, REALLY MEAN."
  • 00:04:13.140 --> 00:04:15.060
  • AND SHE JUST LAUGHED AT ME.
  • 00:04:15.060 --> 00:04:17.080
  • I SAID, "I DON'T EVEN THINK
  • 00:04:17.080 --> 00:04:18.150
  • I LOVE YOU ANYMORE."
  • 00:04:18.150 --> 00:04:19.200
  • BECAUSE SHE HAD JUST BEEN
  • 00:04:19.200 --> 00:04:20.230
  • BEATING ME DOWN FOR SO LONG.
  • 00:04:20.230 --> 00:04:21.240
  • AND SHE AGAIN, JUST LAUGHED
  • 00:04:21.240 --> 00:04:23.020
  • AND ROLLED HER EYES.
  • 00:04:23.020 --> 00:04:24.150
  • IT WAS THAT NIGHT
  • 00:04:24.150 --> 00:04:25.190
  • OR A FEW NIGHTS LATER,
  • 00:04:25.190 --> 00:04:27.080
  • I REMEMBER SITTING
  • 00:04:27.080 --> 00:04:28.180
  • IN THE BATHTUB
  • 00:04:28.180 --> 00:04:29.200
  • BECAUSE I WAS FEELING
  • 00:04:29.200 --> 00:04:30.250
  • JUST EXTREMELY ALONE.
  • 00:04:30.250 --> 00:04:32.000
  • I THOUGHT I WAS MAYBE CRAZY
  • 00:04:32.000 --> 00:04:33.040
  • BECAUSE SHE WAS
  • 00:04:33.040 --> 00:04:34.090
  • GAS LIGHTING ME,
  • 00:04:34.090 --> 00:04:35.170
  • WHICH IS JUST SOMEBODY
  • 00:04:35.170 --> 00:04:36.250
  • WHO MAKES YOU FEEL LIKE
  • 00:04:36.250 --> 00:04:38.010
  • YOU'RE INSANE
  • 00:04:38.010 --> 00:04:39.100
  • SO I WAS IN THE BATHTUB
  • 00:04:40.230 --> 00:04:41.250
  • AND I REMEMBER STARING AT
  • 00:04:41.250 --> 00:04:43.050
  • THIS PLASTIC PINK DAISY RAZOR
  • 00:04:43.050 --> 00:04:45.210
  • AND THINKING, I WONDER
  • 00:04:45.210 --> 00:04:46.290
  • WITH A CHEAP RAZOR?
  • 00:04:49.270 --> 00:04:52.270
  • I DIDN'T WANT TO DIE.
  • 00:04:52.270 --> 00:04:55.100
  • I JUST WANTED HER TO CARE.
  • 00:04:55.100 --> 00:04:57.040
  • LIKE I JUST WANTED HER
  • 00:04:57.040 --> 00:04:58.150
  • TO SEE ME AND SAY,
  • 00:04:58.150 --> 00:05:00.080
  • "I LOVE YOU, DON'T DO THIS."
  • 00:05:00.080 --> 00:05:02.030
  • SO I REMEMBER, AGAIN I'M 14,
  • 00:05:02.030 --> 00:05:04.090
  • SO THIS ISN'T LIKE
  • 00:05:04.090 --> 00:05:05.200
  • THE MOST LOGICAL THING TO SAY
  • 00:05:05.200 --> 00:05:06.230
  • BUT I WAS EMOTIONAL
  • 00:05:06.230 --> 00:05:07.270
  • AND I WAS HEARTBROKEN
  • 00:05:07.270 --> 00:05:09.000
  • AND I YELLED OUT AND I SAID,
  • 00:05:09.000 --> 00:05:10.120
  • I'M GOING TO KILL MYSELF.
  • 00:05:10.120 --> 00:05:12.290
  • SHE SAID, "GO AHEAD.
  • 00:05:12.290 --> 00:05:14.120
  • I DARE YOU."
  • 00:05:14.120 --> 00:05:16.220
  • THAT REALLY ENCAPSULATES
  • 00:05:16.220 --> 00:05:19.210
  • OUR RELATIONSHIP.
  • 00:05:19.280 --> 00:05:22.280
  • I JUST NEVER -- I COULD NOT
  • 00:05:22.280 --> 00:05:24.250
  • MAKE HER FEEL FOR ME OR CARE.
  • 00:05:24.250 --> 00:05:26.170
  • SHE WOULD SAY
  • 00:05:26.170 --> 00:05:27.260
  • THAT SHE LOVED ME
  • 00:05:27.260 --> 00:05:28.280
  • BUT THEN SHE WOULD GO
  • 00:05:28.280 --> 00:05:30.120
  • AND BE SO CRUEL.
  • 00:05:30.120 --> 00:05:32.010
  • SO SHE DID NOT STOP DRINKING.
  • 00:05:32.010 --> 00:05:34.100
  • SO I DID WHAT I FIGURED
  • 00:05:34.100 --> 00:05:36.190
  • I NEEDED TO DO TO NOT BE ALONE
  • 00:05:36.190 --> 00:05:38.020
  • AND I GOT A BOYFRIEND.
  • 00:05:38.050 --> 00:05:41.050
  • THE BOYFRIEND,
  • 00:05:41.050 --> 00:05:42.160
  • HE HAD A MOTHER
  • 00:05:42.160 --> 00:05:43.220
  • WHO WAS ADDICTED TO CRACK
  • 00:05:43.220 --> 00:05:44.260
  • AND HE DID NOT HAVE A DAD.
  • 00:05:44.260 --> 00:05:46.000
  • SO WE JUST BECAME
  • 00:05:46.000 --> 00:05:47.030
  • EACH OTHER'S EVERYTHING.
  • 00:05:48.050 --> 00:05:51.050
  • AT THAT TIME,
  • 00:05:55.290 --> 00:05:58.000
  • MY MOM DIDN'T KNOW
  • 00:05:58.000 --> 00:05:59.090
  • HOW TO DEAL WITH IT.
  • 00:05:59.090 --> 00:06:00.180
  • IT'S BECAUSE
  • 00:06:00.180 --> 00:06:01.240
  • AND HAD ABORTIONS IN HER LIFE
  • 00:06:03.030 --> 00:06:04.080
  • AND SHE HAD NEVER
  • 00:06:04.080 --> 00:06:05.110
  • FACED THOSE THINGS
  • 00:06:05.110 --> 00:06:06.150
  • AND SO I THINK
  • 00:06:06.150 --> 00:06:07.190
  • SHE JUST DIDN'T KNOW
  • 00:06:07.190 --> 00:06:08.210
  • HOW TO PROCESS
  • 00:06:08.210 --> 00:06:09.250
  • WHAT I WAS TELLING HER,
  • 00:06:09.250 --> 00:06:10.280
  • AND SHE KIND OF BECAME
  • 00:06:10.280 --> 00:06:12.020
  • LIKE A LITTLE GIRL.
  • 00:06:12.020 --> 00:06:13.040
  • WHENEVER SHE WAS SCARED
  • 00:06:13.040 --> 00:06:14.050
  • I BECAME THE MOTHER.
  • 00:06:14.050 --> 00:06:15.060
  • SO SHE HAD A BOYFRIEND
  • 00:06:15.060 --> 00:06:16.070
  • WHO WAS HALF HER AGE
  • 00:06:16.070 --> 00:06:17.090
  • WHO WAS ABUSIVE.
  • 00:06:17.090 --> 00:06:18.100
  • I CAME HOME ONE NIGHT
  • 00:06:18.100 --> 00:06:19.120
  • AND HE HAD TORN UP
  • 00:06:19.120 --> 00:06:20.140
  • OUR ENTIRE HOUSE.
  • 00:06:20.140 --> 00:06:21.150
  • I HAD TO BECOME
  • 00:06:21.150 --> 00:06:22.160
  • LIKE THE MOTHER
  • 00:06:22.160 --> 00:06:23.170
  • BECAUSE SHE WAS SO AFRAID.
  • 00:06:23.170 --> 00:06:24.200
  • SO THAT WAS THE WHIPLASH
  • 00:06:24.200 --> 00:06:25.220
  • OF OUR RELATIONSHIP.
  • 00:06:25.220 --> 00:06:26.230
  • SO ANYWAY, I'M 16,
  • 00:06:26.230 --> 00:06:27.240
  • I FOUND OUT I'M PREGNANT.
  • 00:06:27.240 --> 00:06:28.260
  • I CALL MY GRANDMOTHER
  • 00:06:28.260 --> 00:06:30.000
  • WHO LIVED IN PENNSYLVANIA
  • 00:06:30.000 --> 00:06:31.040
  • WHERE I'D COME FROM.
  • 00:06:31.040 --> 00:06:32.070
  • MY MOM WAS IN GEORGIA.
  • 00:06:32.070 --> 00:06:33.130
  • SHE SAID,
  • 00:06:33.130 --> 00:06:34.160
  • "I'LL HAVE IT TAKEN CARE OF."
  • 00:06:34.160 --> 00:06:35.210
  • I WAS LIKE, "NO.
  • 00:06:35.210 --> 00:06:37.290
  • I WANT TO KEEP THE BABY."
  • 00:06:37.290 --> 00:06:39.230
  • SHE JUST HUNG UP
  • 00:06:39.230 --> 00:06:40.260
  • THE PHONE ON ME.
  • 00:06:40.260 --> 00:06:42.050
  • SO IT WAS VERY CONFUSING,
  • 00:06:42.050 --> 00:06:43.110
  • AND I WAS VERY ALONE.
  • 00:06:43.110 --> 00:06:46.000
  • I DID NOT KNOW GOD
  • 00:06:46.000 --> 00:06:48.280
  • BUT I'D ALWAYS
  • 00:06:48.280 --> 00:06:50.170
  • BELIEVED IN HIM.
  • 00:06:50.170 --> 00:06:52.020
  • WHEN I WAS --
  • 00:06:52.020 --> 00:06:53.220
  • THIS IS IMPORTANT TO THE STORY
  • 00:06:53.220 --> 00:06:55.030
  • BECAUSE HE IS ALWAYS WITH US
  • 00:06:55.030 --> 00:06:56.160
  • EVEN IN OUR DEEPEST
  • 00:06:56.160 --> 00:06:57.210
  • DARKEST PITS,
  • 00:06:57.210 --> 00:06:58.260
  • EVEN IF WE DON'T KNOW
  • 00:06:58.260 --> 00:07:00.030
  • HE'S THERE.
  • 00:07:00.030 --> 00:07:01.060
  • SO WHEN I WAS A LITTLE GIRL,
  • 00:07:01.060 --> 00:07:02.080
  • WHEN I WAS PROBABLY
  • 00:07:02.080 --> 00:07:03.110
  • AROUND NINE YEARS OLD,
  • 00:07:03.110 --> 00:07:04.180
  • I HAVE A SISTER
  • 00:07:04.180 --> 00:07:05.210
  • WITH A DIFFERENT DAD
  • 00:07:05.210 --> 00:07:06.280
  • AND HER DAD KIDNAPPED HER.
  • 00:07:06.280 --> 00:07:08.010
  • MY MOM HAD DROPPED HER OFF
  • 00:07:08.010 --> 00:07:09.070
  • FOR A VISITATION
  • 00:07:09.070 --> 00:07:10.140
  • AND HE NEVER CAME BACK.
  • 00:07:10.140 --> 00:07:11.230
  • SO I PRAYED EVERY NIGHT
  • 00:07:11.230 --> 00:07:12.270
  • THAT WE WOULD --
  • 00:07:12.270 --> 00:07:14.020
  • TO THIS GOD I DID NOT KNOW
  • 00:07:14.020 --> 00:07:15.100
  • THAT I WOULD FIND MY SISTER.
  • 00:07:15.100 --> 00:07:16.220
  • AND LIKE AFTER
  • 00:07:16.220 --> 00:07:18.070
  • SIX MONTHS OR A YEAR
  • 00:07:18.070 --> 00:07:19.210
  • WE FOUND HER.
  • 00:07:19.210 --> 00:07:21.030
  • SO TO ME,
  • 00:07:21.030 --> 00:07:22.080
  • IN MY LITTLE GIRL HEART,
  • 00:07:22.080 --> 00:07:23.110
  • I WAS PROBABLY NINE YEARS OLD,
  • 00:07:23.110 --> 00:07:24.180
  • EIGHT OR NINE AT THE TIME,
  • 00:07:24.180 --> 00:07:25.210
  • THAT JUST CEMENTED
  • 00:07:25.210 --> 00:07:26.290
  • THAT THERE WAS A GOD.
  • 00:07:26.290 --> 00:07:28.040
  • THEN RIGHT BEFORE
  • 00:07:28.040 --> 00:07:29.240
  • GETTING PREGNANT,
  • 00:07:29.240 --> 00:07:31.020
  • AROUND 14 YEARS OLD,
  • 00:07:31.020 --> 00:07:32.090
  • I HAD AN UNCLE COME VISIT
  • 00:07:32.090 --> 00:07:33.170
  • AND HE GAVE ME
  • 00:07:33.170 --> 00:07:35.140
  • A CHRISTIAN CASSETTE TAPE.
  • 00:07:35.140 --> 00:07:37.260
  • I REMEMBER LISTENING TO IT
  • 00:07:37.260 --> 00:07:39.030
  • AND JUST CRYING OUT
  • 00:07:39.030 --> 00:07:40.110
  • FOR WHATEVER IT WAS THAT
  • 00:07:40.110 --> 00:07:41.150
  • THIS MAN WAS SINGING ABOUT.
  • 00:07:41.150 --> 00:07:42.220
  • I HAD NO IDEA.
  • 00:07:42.220 --> 00:07:43.260
  • BUT I WAS LIKE,
  • 00:07:43.260 --> 00:07:44.290
  • GOD, WHATEVER THAT IS,
  • 00:07:44.290 --> 00:07:46.010
  • LIKE WHOEVER THIS JESUS IS,
  • 00:07:46.010 --> 00:07:47.010
  • LIKE I WANT HIM.
  • 00:07:47.010 --> 00:07:48.200
  • SO FAST FORWARD NOW, I'M 16
  • 00:07:49.290 --> 00:07:52.290
  • AND I END UP GOING TO BACK
  • 00:07:52.290 --> 00:07:54.130
  • TO PENNSYLVANIA
  • 00:07:54.130 --> 00:07:55.230
  • FOR THE SUMMER.
  • 00:07:55.230 --> 00:07:56.290
  • I'M THREE MONTHS ALONG.
  • 00:07:56.290 --> 00:07:58.040
  • MY FAMILY WON'T LOOK AT ME.
  • 00:07:58.040 --> 00:07:59.150
  • THEY WON'T TALK TO ME.
  • 00:07:59.150 --> 00:08:00.260
  • James: WERE THEY STILL
  • 00:08:00.260 --> 00:08:02.030
  • TRYING TO GET YOU TO...
  • 00:08:02.030 --> 00:08:03.110
  • Sarah: YES! IT WAS CONFUSING
  • 00:08:03.110 --> 00:08:04.160
  • BECAUSE MY STEP MOM
  • 00:08:04.160 --> 00:08:05.190
  • WAS CATHOLIC
  • 00:08:05.190 --> 00:08:06.220
  • AND SHE WAS VERY PRO-LIFE
  • 00:08:06.220 --> 00:08:07.240
  • AND SHE WANTED ME
  • 00:08:07.240 --> 00:08:08.270
  • TO KEEP THE BABY
  • 00:08:08.270 --> 00:08:10.020
  • BUT NOT FOR MYSELF,
  • 00:08:10.020 --> 00:08:11.030
  • SHE WANTED TO RAISE THE BABY.
  • 00:08:11.030 --> 00:08:12.050
  • IT WAS VERY CONFUSING.
  • 00:08:12.050 --> 00:08:13.070
  • NOBODY ASKED ME WHAT I WANTED
  • 00:08:13.070 --> 00:08:14.100
  • BUT I THOUGHT WELL,
  • 00:08:14.100 --> 00:08:15.110
  • I COULD GIVE THE BABY
  • 00:08:15.110 --> 00:08:16.120
  • TO SOMEBODY
  • 00:08:16.120 --> 00:08:17.130
  • WHO CAN'T HAVE KIDS.
  • 00:08:17.130 --> 00:08:18.140
  • BUT MY FAMILY DIDN'T LIKE
  • 00:08:18.140 --> 00:08:19.150
  • THAT IDEA.
  • 00:08:19.150 --> 00:08:20.160
  • BASICALLY,
  • 00:08:20.160 --> 00:08:21.170
  • EVERYBODY WANTED ME
  • 00:08:21.170 --> 00:08:22.180
  • TO JUST HAVE AN ABORTION
  • 00:08:22.180 --> 00:08:23.190
  • BECAUSE I HAD
  • 00:08:23.190 --> 00:08:24.200
  • A PROMINENT FAMILY AND
  • 00:08:24.200 --> 00:08:25.230
  • THEY DIDN'T WANT THIS STAIN
  • 00:08:25.230 --> 00:08:26.280
  • TO BE ON THE FAMILY.
  • 00:08:26.280 --> 00:08:28.020
  • SO EVENTUALLY,
  • 00:08:28.020 --> 00:08:29.050
  • I WAS SO SICK THOUGH
  • 00:08:29.050 --> 00:08:30.080
  • OF BEING ALONE
  • 00:08:30.080 --> 00:08:31.140
  • AND THE BLACK SHEEP
  • 00:08:31.140 --> 00:08:32.280
  • OF THE FAMILY.
  • 00:08:32.280 --> 00:08:34.010
  • LIKE I SAID, MY GRANDMOTHER
  • 00:08:34.010 --> 00:08:35.100
  • WHO WAS SO CLOSE TO ME
  • 00:08:35.100 --> 00:08:36.150
  • WOULDN'T EVEN LOOK AT ME.
  • 00:08:36.150 --> 00:08:39.050
  • I WAS VERY, VERY SICK.
  • 00:08:39.050 --> 00:08:40.110
  • I WAS THROWING UP
  • 00:08:40.110 --> 00:08:41.160
  • MORNING, NOON, AND NIGHT.
  • 00:08:41.160 --> 00:08:42.170
  • SO NOT ONLY AM I SUPER SICK
  • 00:08:42.170 --> 00:08:43.200
  • BUT I'M ALONE.
  • 00:08:43.200 --> 00:08:44.210
  • SO FINALLY, I'M LIKE,
  • 00:08:44.210 --> 00:08:45.220
  • I'M DONE WITH THIS.
  • 00:08:45.220 --> 00:08:46.230
  • I'M LIKE FINE.
  • 00:08:46.230 --> 00:08:47.240
  • I'LL HAVE THE ABORTION.
  • 00:08:47.240 --> 00:08:50.120
  • SO BECAUSE I WAS IN
  • 00:08:50.120 --> 00:08:52.040
  • A PROMINENT FAMILY
  • 00:08:52.040 --> 00:08:53.090
  • THEY ACTUALLY CHANGED MY NAME
  • 00:08:53.090 --> 00:08:54.090
  • AND TOOK ME TO A HOSPITAL.
  • 00:08:54.090 --> 00:08:55.120
  • THE DOCTOR SAID
  • 00:08:55.120 --> 00:08:56.120
  • IN THE CLINIC
  • 00:08:57.130 --> 00:08:58.120
  • SO THEY TOOK ME TO A HOSPITAL
  • 00:08:58.120 --> 00:08:59.120
  • AND PUT ME UNDER
  • 00:08:59.120 --> 00:09:00.150
  • AND CHANGED MY NAME.
  • 00:09:00.150 --> 00:09:01.170
  • I WOKE UP TWO DAYS LATER
  • 00:09:01.170 --> 00:09:03.140
  • WHO DIDN'T TALK TO ME BEFORE
  • 00:09:06.040 --> 00:09:07.110
  • BUT NOW IS SERVING ME TOAST
  • 00:09:07.110 --> 00:09:08.160
  • WITH A SMILE.
  • 00:09:08.160 --> 00:09:09.270
  • AND WE NEVER TALKED
  • 00:09:09.270 --> 00:09:11.020
  • ABOUT IT AGAIN.
  • 00:09:11.020 --> 00:09:13.040
  • SO I END UP GOING BACK
  • 00:09:13.040 --> 00:09:14.090
  • WITH MY MOM THINKING
  • 00:09:14.090 --> 00:09:15.110
  • I HAVE TO STAY THERE.
  • 00:09:15.110 --> 00:09:16.120
  • I FELT STUCK.
  • 00:09:16.120 --> 00:09:18.150
  • REALLY,
  • 00:09:18.150 --> 00:09:19.190
  • I PROBABLY ONLY STAYED
  • 00:09:19.190 --> 00:09:20.200
  • BECAUSE OF THE BOYFRIEND
  • 00:09:20.200 --> 00:09:21.210
  • BUT AT THIS POINT MY MOM
  • 00:09:21.210 --> 00:09:22.230
  • AND OUR RELATIONSHIP
  • 00:09:22.230 --> 00:09:23.250
  • WAS JUST TERRIBLE.
  • 00:09:23.250 --> 00:09:25.040
  • I REALLY HATED HER.
  • 00:09:26.100 --> 00:09:29.100
  • AFTER ANOTHER YEAR THERE
  • 00:09:29.100 --> 00:09:30.180
  • I FINALLY WAS LIKE,
  • 00:09:30.180 --> 00:09:31.200
  • I'VE GOT TO GET OUT OF HERE.
  • 00:09:31.200 --> 00:09:32.220
  • SO I WAS -- MY BOYFRIEND
  • 00:09:32.220 --> 00:09:33.250
  • HAD LIKE A TRAILER,
  • 00:09:33.250 --> 00:09:35.040
  • IT WAS SO GROSS.
  • 00:09:35.040 --> 00:09:36.120
  • THERE WAS SO MANY
  • 00:09:36.120 --> 00:09:37.160
  • TERRIBLE THINGS.
  • 00:09:37.160 --> 00:09:38.220
  • HIS SISTER
  • 00:09:38.220 --> 00:09:39.260
  • WAS PROSTITUTING HERSELF
  • 00:09:39.260 --> 00:09:40.280
  • OUT OF OUR TRAILER.
  • 00:09:40.280 --> 00:09:42.060
  • I DIDN'T WANT THIS LIFE
  • 00:09:42.060 --> 00:09:43.110
  • ANYMORE AT 16 YEARS OLD,
  • 00:09:43.110 --> 00:09:44.160
  • 17 YEARS OLD,
  • 00:09:44.160 --> 00:09:45.190
  • SO I FINALLY MOVED BACK
  • 00:09:45.190 --> 00:09:46.240
  • TO PENNSYLVANIA.
  • 00:09:46.240 --> 00:09:47.270
  • I THOUGHT,
  • 00:09:47.270 --> 00:09:49.000
  • I CAN JUST START OVER.
  • 00:09:49.000 --> 00:09:50.060
  • I'M GOING TO HAVE A NEW LIFE.
  • 00:09:50.060 --> 00:09:51.100
  • I DON'T WANT TO DO THIS.
  • 00:09:51.100 --> 00:09:52.130
  • AND I HATE MY MOM.
  • 00:09:52.130 --> 00:09:53.170
  • I DON'T HAVE TO HAVE ANYTHING
  • 00:09:53.170 --> 00:09:54.190
  • TO DO WITH HER ANYMORE.
  • 00:09:54.190 --> 00:09:55.220
  • LIKE I'M OUT.
  • 00:09:55.220 --> 00:09:57.280
  • THAT'S WHEN THE LORD
  • 00:09:57.280 --> 00:09:59.080
  • BEGAN TO CALL ME TO HIMSELF
  • 00:09:59.080 --> 00:10:00.210
  • AND THAT CHANGED EVERYTHING
  • 00:10:00.210 --> 00:10:02.090
  • BECAUSE I WOULD NOT HAVE HAD
  • 00:10:02.090 --> 00:10:03.190
  • ANYTHING TO DO WITH MY MOM.
  • 00:10:03.190 --> 00:10:05.070
  • SHE WOUNDED ME
  • 00:10:05.070 --> 00:10:06.130
  • SO VERY DEEPLY.
  • 00:10:06.130 --> 00:10:07.200
  • I FELT VERY ALONE.
  • 00:10:07.200 --> 00:10:09.020
  • BUT I CAME TO KNOW THE LORD,
  • 00:10:09.020 --> 00:10:12.010
  • IN HIGH SCHOOL,
  • 00:10:12.010 --> 00:10:13.080
  • THROUGH YOUNG LIFE .
  • 00:10:13.080 --> 00:10:14.130
  • AFTER THAT HAPPENED,
  • 00:10:14.130 --> 00:10:15.170
  • I FELT LIKE,
  • 00:10:15.170 --> 00:10:16.200
  • AND I KNEW THROUGH
  • 00:10:16.200 --> 00:10:17.290
  • READING THE SCRIPTURES,
  • 00:10:17.290 --> 00:10:19.060
  • THAT GOD KEPT CALLING ME
  • 00:10:19.060 --> 00:10:20.160
  • TO LOVE HER AND FORGIVE HER.
  • 00:10:20.160 --> 00:10:22.090
  • I WAS LIKE, NO, NO, NO.
  • 00:10:23.240 --> 00:10:26.240
  • HOW DO YOU FORGIVE SOMEBODY
  • 00:10:26.240 --> 00:10:28.080
  • WHO WOUNDED YOU SO DEEPLY
  • 00:10:28.080 --> 00:10:29.150
  • AND WHO KEEPS DOING IT?
  • 00:10:29.150 --> 00:10:31.160
  • LIKE IF I WOULD TALK TO HER
  • 00:10:31.160 --> 00:10:32.280
  • ON THE PHONE
  • 00:10:32.280 --> 00:10:34.000
  • IT WAS NAME CALLING,
  • 00:10:34.000 --> 00:10:35.030
  • IT WAS CONSTANT
  • 00:10:35.030 --> 00:10:36.100
  • JUST CUTTING ME DOWN.
  • 00:10:36.100 --> 00:10:37.180
  • IF I TRIED TO VISIT HER
  • 00:10:37.180 --> 00:10:38.230
  • IT WAS JUST
  • 00:10:38.230 --> 00:10:40.020
  • I WOULD LEAVE IN TEARS.
  • 00:10:40.020 --> 00:10:41.140
  • SO I WAS LIKE, LORD, HOW?
  • 00:10:41.140 --> 00:10:44.050
  • HOW DO I DO THIS?
  • 00:10:44.050 --> 00:10:46.070
  • AND BECAUSE HE IS SO KIND.
  • 00:10:46.070 --> 00:10:48.180
  • I LEARNED THAT FIRST FOR ME,
  • 00:10:48.180 --> 00:10:50.280
  • I HAD TO MAKE THAT DECISION
  • 00:10:50.280 --> 00:10:52.250
  • LIKE OKAY, GOD,
  • 00:10:52.250 --> 00:10:54.030
  • I WILL TRUST YOU
  • 00:10:54.030 --> 00:10:55.080
  • AND I WILL SURRENDER
  • 00:10:55.080 --> 00:10:56.140
  • AND I WILL CHOOSE
  • 00:10:56.140 --> 00:10:57.240
  • TO FORGIVE HER
  • 00:10:57.240 --> 00:10:59.010
  • BUT YOU'RE GOING
  • 00:10:59.010 --> 00:11:00.090
  • TO HAVE TO SHOW ME
  • 00:11:00.090 --> 00:11:01.150
  • HOW TO WALK THAT OUT
  • 00:11:01.150 --> 00:11:02.180
  • AND MAKE IT REAL.
  • 00:11:02.180 --> 00:11:03.230
  • SO GOD IN HIS KINDNESS
  • 00:11:03.230 --> 00:11:04.290
  • BROUGHT PEOPLE INTO MY LIFE
  • 00:11:04.290 --> 00:11:06.050
  • TO TEACH ME WHAT TO DO.
  • 00:11:06.050 --> 00:11:07.120
  • AND THERE'S THREE
  • 00:11:07.120 --> 00:11:08.160
  • PRETTY SIGNIFICANT THINGS
  • 00:11:08.160 --> 00:11:09.220
  • I WOULD LOVE TO SHARE
  • 00:11:09.220 --> 00:11:10.260
  • WITH YOU ON HOW HE TAUGHT ME
  • 00:11:10.260 --> 00:11:12.040
  • TO LOVE AND FORGIVE MY MOTHER.
  • 00:11:12.040 --> 00:11:13.140
  • THE FIRST ONE IS HE TAUGHT ME
  • 00:11:13.140 --> 00:11:15.280
  • THAT I NEEDED TO DEAL
  • 00:11:15.280 --> 00:11:17.080
  • WITH SOME DEEPLY HELD LIES
  • 00:11:17.080 --> 00:11:19.090
  • THAT I WAS BELIEVING.
  • 00:11:19.090 --> 00:11:21.020
  • HE DID THIS THROUGH A MENTOR
  • 00:11:21.020 --> 00:11:22.140
  • WHO I WENT TO HER HOUSE
  • 00:11:22.140 --> 00:11:23.200
  • ONE DAY IN COLLEGE
  • 00:11:23.200 --> 00:11:24.260
  • AND I WAS LIKE,
  • 00:11:24.260 --> 00:11:26.040
  • "I'M AN EMOTIONAL MESS."
  • 00:11:26.040 --> 00:11:27.110
  • SHE STARTED WRITING
  • 00:11:27.110 --> 00:11:28.160
  • THESE WORDS ON A PAGE
  • 00:11:28.160 --> 00:11:29.260
  • AND SHE WROTE LIKE,
  • 00:11:29.260 --> 00:11:31.070
  • "I AM STUPID.
  • 00:11:31.070 --> 00:11:33.160
  • I AM NOT IN CONTROL.
  • 00:11:33.160 --> 00:11:34.270
  • I'M NOT GOOD ENOUGH."
  • 00:11:34.270 --> 00:11:36.030
  • SHE JUST KEPT WRITING
  • 00:11:36.030 --> 00:11:37.060
  • THESE THINGS.
  • 00:11:37.060 --> 00:11:38.100
  • SHE'S LIKE,
  • 00:11:38.100 --> 00:11:39.150
  • "DO ANY OF THESE HIT YOU?"
  • 00:11:39.150 --> 00:11:40.200
  • AND ONE WAS
  • 00:11:40.200 --> 00:11:41.270
  • "I'M NOT TAKEN SERIOUSLY.
  • 00:11:41.270 --> 00:11:43.050
  • SO I'M NOT GOOD ENOUGH,
  • 00:11:43.050 --> 00:11:44.180
  • I'M NOT TAKEN SERIOUSLY,
  • 00:11:44.180 --> 00:11:45.250
  • I'M STUPID" --
  • 00:11:45.250 --> 00:11:47.000
  • ALL OF THOSE THINGS.
  • 00:11:47.000 --> 00:11:48.050
  • "I'M UGLY,"
  • 00:11:48.050 --> 00:11:49.070
  • BECAUSE MY MOM HAD TOLD ME
  • 00:11:49.070 --> 00:11:50.090
  • I WAS UGLY.
  • 00:11:50.090 --> 00:11:51.110
  • SO I'M LIKE, "I BELIEVE
  • 00:11:51.110 --> 00:11:52.120
  • ALL OF THESE THINGS
  • 00:11:52.120 --> 00:11:53.170
  • ABOUT MYSELF."
  • 00:11:53.170 --> 00:11:54.200
  • I HAD TO BEGIN
  • 00:11:54.200 --> 00:11:55.260
  • TO BELIEVE THE TRUTH BECAUSE
  • 00:11:55.260 --> 00:11:57.040
  • DEALING WITH OUR LIVES
  • 00:11:57.040 --> 00:11:58.080
  • PUSHES US TOWARD THE GOSPEL.
  • 00:11:58.100 --> 00:12:01.120
  • THAT IT WAS OKAY IF SOMEBODY
  • 00:12:03.030 --> 00:12:04.130
  • DIDN'T TAKE ME SERIOUSLY
  • 00:12:04.130 --> 00:12:05.170
  • BECAUSE MY WORTH
  • 00:12:05.170 --> 00:12:07.010
  • IS ONLY IN JESUS.
  • 00:12:07.010 --> 00:12:09.130
  • I DIDN'T KNOW THIS.
  • 00:12:10.240 --> 00:12:13.040
  • TO LEARN THAT ONLY GOD HAD --
  • 00:12:13.040 --> 00:12:15.020
  • ONLY GOD HAS THE AUTHORITY
  • 00:12:15.020 --> 00:12:16.140
  • TO TELL ME WHO I AM,
  • 00:12:16.140 --> 00:12:18.080
  • THAT CHANGED EVERYTHING
  • 00:12:18.080 --> 00:12:19.180
  • FOR ME.
  • 00:12:19.180 --> 00:12:20.220
  • AND IT WAS STILL A PROCESS
  • 00:12:20.220 --> 00:12:22.040
  • OF WORKING THROUGH MY LIES,
  • 00:12:22.040 --> 00:12:23.120
  • REPLACING THEM WITH THE TRUTH
  • 00:12:23.120 --> 00:12:24.180
  • BUT DISCOVERING SORT OF
  • 00:12:24.180 --> 00:12:25.270
  • THOSE DEEPLY HELD CORE LIES
  • 00:12:25.270 --> 00:12:27.090
  • WAS A HUGE FIRST STEP.
  • 00:12:27.090 --> 00:12:29.280
  • WE ALL HAVE THEM
  • 00:12:29.280 --> 00:12:31.080
  • BECAUSE AS CHILDREN
  • 00:12:31.080 --> 00:12:32.180
  • WE'RE EXCELLENT OBSERVERS
  • 00:12:32.180 --> 00:12:33.220
  • OF OUR WORLD, RIGHT?
  • 00:12:33.220 --> 00:12:34.270
  • BUT WE'RE TERRIBLE
  • 00:12:34.270 --> 00:12:36.030
  • INTERPRETERS.
  • 00:12:36.030 --> 00:12:37.060
  • SO YES,
  • 00:12:37.060 --> 00:12:38.080
  • MY MOM WAS CRUEL TO ME
  • 00:12:38.080 --> 00:12:39.110
  • BUT IT DID NOT MEAN
  • 00:12:39.110 --> 00:12:40.170
  • I WASN'T LOVABLE IF
  • 00:12:40.170 --> 00:12:41.210
  • SHE DIDN'T TAKE ME SERIOUSLY.
  • 00:12:41.210 --> 00:12:43.050
  • SO THAT WAS A BIG ONE
  • 00:12:43.050 --> 00:12:44.120
  • AND THAT'S FLUSHED OUT MORE
  • 00:12:44.120 --> 00:12:45.170
  • IN THE BOOK.
  • 00:12:45.170 --> 00:12:46.250
  • THE SECOND ONE WAS LEARNING
  • 00:12:46.250 --> 00:12:47.290
  • HOW TO SET BOUNDARIES.
  • 00:12:47.290 --> 00:12:49.020
  • OKAY, GOD,
  • 00:12:49.020 --> 00:12:50.030
  • YOU WANT ME TO LOVE MY MOM
  • 00:12:50.030 --> 00:12:51.080
  • AND FORGIVE HER AND BE
  • 00:12:51.080 --> 00:12:52.090
  • IN RELATIONSHIP WITH HER?
  • 00:12:52.090 --> 00:12:53.120
  • LIKE HOW?
  • 00:12:53.120 --> 00:12:54.150
  • BECAUSE SHE CUTS ME.
  • 00:12:54.150 --> 00:12:55.240
  • AND I REMEMBER THERE WAS
  • 00:12:55.240 --> 00:12:57.020
  • THIS ALCOHOL COUNSELOR
  • 00:12:57.020 --> 00:12:58.120
  • THAT WAS A GUEST LECTURER
  • 00:12:58.120 --> 00:12:59.170
  • IN MY COLLEGE CLASS
  • 00:12:59.170 --> 00:13:00.240
  • AND I RAN UP TO HIM
  • 00:13:00.240 --> 00:13:02.030
  • BECAUSE HE WAS
  • 00:13:02.030 --> 00:13:03.070
  • AN ADDICTION SPECIALIST.
  • 00:13:03.070 --> 00:13:04.090
  • I SAID, "WHAT DO I DO?
  • 00:13:04.090 --> 00:13:05.200
  • WHEN I TALK WITH MY MOM,
  • 00:13:05.200 --> 00:13:06.270
  • WE JUST GO DOWN THIS SPIRAL."
  • 00:13:06.290 --> 00:13:09.290
  • HE SAID,
  • 00:13:09.290 --> 00:13:11.080
  • "IF I HAVE A BALL IN MY HAND
  • 00:13:11.080 --> 00:13:12.130
  • AND I THROW IT TO YOU,
  • 00:13:12.130 --> 00:13:13.180
  • WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO?"
  • 00:13:13.180 --> 00:13:14.230
  • I SAID,
  • 00:13:14.230 --> 00:13:16.030
  • "I'M GOING TO CATCH IT."
  • 00:13:16.030 --> 00:13:17.100
  • HE GOES, "THEN WHAT?"
  • 00:13:17.100 --> 00:13:18.140
  • I SAID, "WELL,
  • 00:13:18.140 --> 00:13:19.200
  • I'M GOING TO THROW IT BACK."
  • 00:13:19.200 --> 00:13:20.240
  • HE SAID,
  • 00:13:20.240 --> 00:13:21.280
  • "OH, SO YOU'VE DECIDED
  • 00:13:21.280 --> 00:13:23.010
  • TO PLAY THE GAME."
  • 00:13:23.010 --> 00:13:24.040
  • HE SAID, "IF YOU DON'T WANT
  • 00:13:24.040 --> 00:13:25.110
  • TO PLAY THE GAME ANYMORE
  • 00:13:25.110 --> 00:13:26.150
  • STOP THROWING THE BALL BACK."
  • 00:13:26.150 --> 00:13:27.210
  • THAT WAS MY FIRST EXPERIENCE
  • 00:13:27.210 --> 00:13:28.260
  • WITH WHAT IT MEANT
  • 00:13:28.260 --> 00:13:30.050
  • TO SET BOUNDARIES.
  • 00:13:30.050 --> 00:13:31.090
  • I DON'T HAVE TO STAY
  • 00:13:31.090 --> 00:13:32.190
  • IN THIS SPIRAL.
  • 00:13:32.190 --> 00:13:33.240
  • I CAN HANG UP THE PHONE.
  • 00:13:33.240 --> 00:13:34.290
  • I DON'T HAVE TO WAIT
  • 00:13:34.290 --> 00:13:36.010
  • UNTIL SHE'S HAPPY
  • 00:13:36.010 --> 00:13:37.040
  • OR PLEASED WITH ME.
  • 00:13:37.040 --> 00:13:38.070
  • I CAN STOP THIS TOXIC CYCLE.
  • 00:13:39.020 --> 00:13:42.020
  • AND BOUNDARIES ARE REALLY
  • 00:13:42.020 --> 00:13:43.030
  • JUST WHAT WILL I TOLERATE
  • 00:13:43.030 --> 00:13:44.090
  • AND WHAT WILL I NOT TOLERATE?
  • 00:13:44.090 --> 00:13:45.250
  • AND AGAIN,
  • 00:13:45.250 --> 00:13:47.020
  • THAT'S FLUSHED OUT WAY MORE.
  • 00:13:47.020 --> 00:13:48.070
  • AND THE THIRD
  • 00:13:48.070 --> 00:13:49.080
  • REALLY IMPORTANT THING
  • 00:13:49.080 --> 00:13:50.130
  • THAT I WANT TO SAY TO ANYBODY
  • 00:13:50.130 --> 00:13:51.210
  • WHO IS STRUGGLING
  • 00:13:51.210 --> 00:13:52.250
  • WITH A DIFFICULT RELATIONSHIP
  • 00:13:52.250 --> 00:13:54.080
  • AND YOU'RE TRYING
  • 00:13:54.080 --> 00:13:55.110
  • TO FIGURE OUT HOW ON EARTH
  • 00:13:55.110 --> 00:13:56.120
  • DO I FORGIVE THIS PERSON
  • 00:13:56.120 --> 00:13:57.170
  • LET ALONE LOVE THEM,
  • 00:13:57.170 --> 00:13:58.240
  • IS WE HAVE TO LEARN
  • 00:13:58.240 --> 00:14:00.030
  • HOW TO MOURN WHAT WE LOST.
  • 00:14:00.030 --> 00:14:02.060
  • SO WE DON'T MOURN THE FUTURE
  • 00:14:02.060 --> 00:14:03.130
  • BECAUSE THAT'S WHERE
  • 00:14:03.130 --> 00:14:04.170
  • HOPE SITS.
  • 00:14:04.170 --> 00:14:05.260
  • BUT THE REALITY WAS
  • 00:14:05.260 --> 00:14:07.000
  • I DIDN'T HAVE A MOTHER;
  • 00:14:07.000 --> 00:14:08.040
  • I DID NOT HAVE
  • 00:14:08.040 --> 00:14:09.070
  • A NURTURING MOTHER.
  • 00:14:09.070 --> 00:14:10.160
  • AND THAT WAS A VALID LOSS.
  • 00:14:10.160 --> 00:14:11.220
  • SO I HAD TO GRIEVE THAT.
  • 00:14:11.220 --> 00:14:13.020
  • BUT WHEN YOU GRIEVE SOMETHING
  • 00:14:13.020 --> 00:14:14.140
  • AND YOU LET GO
  • 00:14:14.140 --> 00:14:15.230
  • OF THE EXPECTATION
  • 00:14:15.230 --> 00:14:16.240
  • THAT SHE'LL EVER BE THAT,
  • 00:14:16.240 --> 00:14:17.280
  • THAT SHE WOULD BE A MOTHER
  • 00:14:17.280 --> 00:14:19.030
  • THAT TAUGHT ME THEN HOW
  • 00:14:19.030 --> 00:14:20.120
  • TO LOVE HER JUST AS A HUMAN
  • 00:14:20.120 --> 00:14:22.070
  • MADE IN THE IMAGE OF GOD,
  • 00:14:22.070 --> 00:14:23.120
  • IN NEED OF LOVE.
  • 00:14:23.120 --> 00:14:25.010
  • SO ALL OF THOSE THINGS
  • 00:14:25.010 --> 00:14:26.130
  • WERE EXTREMELY HELPFUL
  • 00:14:26.130 --> 00:14:29.030
  • IN THE JOURNEY FOR ME
  • 00:14:29.030 --> 00:14:30.090
  • ON LEARNING HOW TO LOVE
  • 00:14:30.090 --> 00:14:31.110
  • AND FORGIVE HER.
  • 00:14:31.110 --> 00:14:32.130
  • AND HERE'S
  • 00:14:32.130 --> 00:14:33.200
  • THE INCREDIBLE THING.
  • 00:14:33.200 --> 00:14:34.240
  • THERE IS SO MANY IMPOSSIBLE
  • 00:14:34.240 --> 00:14:35.280
  • PRAYERS AND MIRACULOUS THINGS
  • 00:14:35.280 --> 00:14:37.020
  • THAT HAPPENED, YOU GUYS,
  • 00:14:37.020 --> 00:14:38.060
  • AND I WISH I HAD THE TIME
  • 00:14:38.060 --> 00:14:39.080
  • TO TELL YOU ALL OF THEM
  • 00:14:39.080 --> 00:14:40.100
  • RIGHT NOW
  • 00:14:40.100 --> 00:14:41.160
  • BUT THEY ARE IN THE BOOK.
  • 00:14:41.160 --> 00:14:42.230
  • BUT ONE THING IS
  • 00:14:42.230 --> 00:14:43.260
  • AFTER SHE PASSED AWAY
  • 00:14:43.260 --> 00:14:45.000
  • I WAS ABLE TO GET A HOLD
  • 00:14:45.000 --> 00:14:46.040
  • OF HER JOURNALS
  • 00:14:46.040 --> 00:14:47.110
  • AND READING THEM
  • 00:14:47.110 --> 00:14:48.170
  • BROKE MY HEART
  • 00:14:48.170 --> 00:14:49.200
  • BECAUSE I HAD NO IDEA
  • 00:14:49.200 --> 00:14:50.240
  • HOW WOUNDED SHE WAS.
  • 00:14:50.240 --> 00:14:51.270
  • AND HOW ALONE SHE WAS.
  • 00:14:51.270 --> 00:14:53.030
  • IT MADE ME WANT
  • 00:14:53.030 --> 00:14:54.090
  • TO LOVE EVERYBODY BECAUSE
  • 00:14:54.090 --> 00:14:56.270
  • EVERYBODY HAS SOMETHING
  • 00:14:56.270 --> 00:14:59.030
  • GOING ON
  • 00:14:59.030 --> 00:15:00.150
  • THAT WE DON'T EVEN SEE.
  • 00:15:00.150 --> 00:15:01.210
  • I HAD NO IDEA
  • 00:15:01.210 --> 00:15:02.240
  • HOW DESPERATE SHE WAS
  • 00:15:02.240 --> 00:15:03.270
  • FOR THE LOVE OF A FATHER
  • 00:15:03.270 --> 00:15:05.000
  • THAT SHE NEVER HAD.
  • 00:15:05.000 --> 00:15:06.230
  • AND I WAS DESPERATE
  • 00:15:06.230 --> 00:15:07.260
  • FOR THE LOVE OF A MOTHER
  • 00:15:07.260 --> 00:15:09.020
  • THAT I DIDN'T HAVE.
  • 00:15:09.020 --> 00:15:10.110
  • James: DON'T YOU APPRECIATE
  • 00:15:10.110 --> 00:15:11.130
  • HER SHARING HER JOURNEY?
  • 00:15:12.240 --> 00:15:15.240
  • IT IS COMPLEX
  • 00:15:15.240 --> 00:15:18.040
  • AND COMPLICATED
  • 00:15:18.040 --> 00:15:19.280
  • THIS IS A BEAUTIFUL WORK
  • 00:15:21.120 --> 00:15:22.160
  • OF GOD THAT IS IN PROCESS
  • 00:15:22.160 --> 00:15:24.110
  • AND CONTINUING.
  • 00:15:24.110 --> 00:15:26.040
  • THE THING I WANT
  • 00:15:26.040 --> 00:15:27.130
  • I DON'T KNOW WHERE YOU ARE,
  • 00:15:28.210 --> 00:15:29.220
  • I DON'T KNOW
  • 00:15:29.220 --> 00:15:31.020
  • HOW YOU'RE RESPONDING,
  • 00:15:31.020 --> 00:15:32.110
  • I DON'T KNOW WHAT'S GOING ON
  • 00:15:32.110 --> 00:15:33.170
  • IN YOUR MIND
  • 00:15:33.170 --> 00:15:34.250
  • BUT I'VE BEEN PREACHING NOW,
  • 00:15:34.250 --> 00:15:35.290
  • I'M APPROACHING 60 YEARS
  • 00:15:35.290 --> 00:15:37.110
  • OF LOOKING INTO
  • 00:15:37.110 --> 00:15:38.230
  • THE FACES OF PEOPLE,
  • 00:15:38.230 --> 00:15:40.000
  • AND BETTY AND I ON TELEVISION
  • 00:15:40.000 --> 00:15:41.080
  • FOR 50 YEARS,
  • 00:15:41.230 --> 00:15:44.230
  • AND I CAN SEE HURT.
  • 00:15:44.230 --> 00:15:46.270
  • I CAN SEE HUNGER.
  • 00:15:46.270 --> 00:15:49.040
  • I'M TELLING YOU
  • 00:15:49.040 --> 00:15:51.070
  • THERE IS A FATHER,
  • 00:15:51.070 --> 00:15:52.180
  • THIS IS A FATHERLESS PERSON
  • 00:15:52.180 --> 00:15:55.030
  • WHO MET THE FATHER
  • 00:15:55.030 --> 00:15:57.130
  • THAT EVERYONE CAN MEET.
  • 00:15:57.130 --> 00:15:59.080
  • AND EVEN IF YOU HAD
  • 00:15:59.080 --> 00:16:00.220
  • A GOOD FATHER
  • 00:16:00.220 --> 00:16:02.040
  • OR AN OKAY FATHER,
  • 00:16:02.040 --> 00:16:05.010
  • THERE IS THE ULTIMATE
  • 00:16:05.010 --> 00:16:06.150
  • PERFECT FATHER,
  • 00:16:06.150 --> 00:16:07.210
  • AND HE HAS A PERFECT
  • 00:16:07.210 --> 00:16:10.010
  • UNDERSTANDING OF YOU
  • 00:16:10.010 --> 00:16:11.290
  • AND LOVE.
  • 00:16:11.290 --> 00:16:13.210
  • HE REALLY WANTS TO HOLD YOU
  • 00:16:13.210 --> 00:16:16.120
  • SO CLOSE TO HIS HEART THAT
  • 00:16:16.120 --> 00:16:18.020
  • YOU IDENTIFY WITH HIS LOVE
  • 00:16:18.020 --> 00:16:20.250
  • AND YOU IDENTIFY
  • 00:16:20.250 --> 00:16:22.210
  • WITH HIS CONCERNS.
  • 00:16:22.210 --> 00:16:24.030
  • YOU'RE A CONCERN.
  • 00:16:24.030 --> 00:16:25.110
  • HE WANTS TO HEAL THE HURT
  • 00:16:25.110 --> 00:16:26.270
  • IN THE MOST COMPLICATED LIFE
  • 00:16:26.270 --> 00:16:28.090
  • OR HEART OR MIND -- HE CAN.
  • 00:16:29.200 --> 00:16:32.200
  • AND THAT'S THE REASON
  • 00:16:32.200 --> 00:16:34.000
  • YOU'RE LISTENING.
  • 00:16:34.000 --> 00:16:35.110
  • BECAUSE THE GOD
  • 00:16:35.110 --> 00:16:36.220
  • THAT CHANGES LIFE
  • 00:16:36.220 --> 00:16:38.000
  • THAT GAVE HIS SON
  • 00:16:38.000 --> 00:16:39.110
  • THAT THROUGH CHRIST
  • 00:16:39.110 --> 00:16:40.160
  • WE CAN HAVE LIFE EVEN WHEN
  • 00:16:40.160 --> 00:16:41.280
  • SHE WAS SEEKING COUNSELORS,
  • 00:16:41.280 --> 00:16:44.140
  • SHE WAS SEEKING THE COUNSEL
  • 00:16:44.140 --> 00:16:45.260
  • OF THE FATHER THROUGH PEOPLE
  • 00:16:45.260 --> 00:16:48.090
  • WHO WOULD SEEM TO UNDERSTAND.
  • 00:16:48.230 --> 00:16:51.230
  • SO YOU'RE SEEKING.
  • 00:16:51.230 --> 00:16:53.020
  • THAT'S WHY YOU'RE WATCHING.
  • 00:16:53.020 --> 00:16:54.130
  • I THINK GETTING THE BOOK
  • 00:16:54.130 --> 00:16:55.230
  • WOULD BE A BLESSING TO YOU,
  • 00:16:55.230 --> 00:16:57.000
  • PERHAPS.
  • 00:16:57.000 --> 00:16:58.070
  • BUT HERE'S THE THING
  • 00:16:58.070 --> 00:16:59.130
  • I WANT YOU TO KNOW,
  • 00:16:59.130 --> 00:17:00.230
  • RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE,
  • 00:17:00.230 --> 00:17:02.020
  • THE FATHER WANTS TO PULL YOU
  • 00:17:02.020 --> 00:17:03.090
  • UP RIGHT INTO HIS ARMS.
  • 00:17:03.090 --> 00:17:04.160
  • HE REALLY DOES.
  • 00:17:04.160 --> 00:17:05.250
  • HE WANTS TO BE THE COMFORT
  • 00:17:05.250 --> 00:17:07.020
  • YOU NEVER THOUGHT
  • 00:17:07.020 --> 00:17:08.090
  • YOU COULD EXPERIENCE.
  • 00:17:08.090 --> 00:17:09.140
  • THAT'S THE REASON
  • 00:17:09.140 --> 00:17:10.190
  • WE COME INTO YOUR HOME
  • 00:17:10.190 --> 00:17:11.270
  • TO SHARE LIFE TODAY ,
  • 00:17:11.270 --> 00:17:13.050
  • NOT JUST WITH PEOPLE ON
  • 00:17:13.050 --> 00:17:14.100
  • THE OTHER SIDE OF THE WORLD
  • 00:17:14.100 --> 00:17:15.150
  • OR IN DIFFICULT CIRCUMSTANCES,
  • 00:17:15.150 --> 00:17:17.150
  • HUNGER OR THIRST -- BUT YOU.
  • 00:17:17.290 --> 00:17:20.290
  • FATHER,
  • 00:17:20.290 --> 00:17:22.190
  • I PRAY FOR EVERY PERSON
  • 00:17:22.190 --> 00:17:23.260
  • YOU'RE SPEAKING TO RIGHT NOW
  • 00:17:23.260 --> 00:17:25.040
  • AND YOU ARE,
  • 00:17:25.040 --> 00:17:28.000
  • AND YOU REALLY WANT
  • 00:17:28.000 --> 00:17:29.070
  • TO HOLD THEM
  • 00:17:29.070 --> 00:17:30.190
  • AND HEAL THEIR BROKEN HEART.
  • 00:17:30.190 --> 00:17:33.010
  • AND ULTIMATELY,
  • 00:17:33.010 --> 00:17:34.110
  • MAKE THEM A HEALER
  • 00:17:34.110 --> 00:17:35.290
  • OF BROKEN HEARTS
  • 00:17:35.290 --> 00:17:38.140
  • WHEN HAVING RECEIVED
  • 00:17:38.140 --> 00:17:39.250
  • YOUR LOVE, YOUR GRACE,
  • 00:17:39.250 --> 00:17:41.090
  • YOUR FORGIVENESS,
  • 00:17:41.090 --> 00:17:43.010
  • THEY SUDDENLY
  • 00:17:43.010 --> 00:17:44.220
  • BEGIN TO SHARE IT.
  • 00:17:44.220 --> 00:17:46.130
  • PLEASE LORD,
  • 00:17:46.130 --> 00:17:48.240
  • PLEASE TAKE THEM IN YOUR ARMS.
  • 00:17:49.000 --> 00:17:52.000
  • HE IS REACHING OUT TO YOU
  • 00:17:52.000 --> 00:17:53.120
  • RIGHT NOW.
  • 00:17:53.120 --> 00:17:54.290
  • YOU JUST REACH OUT AND SAY,
  • 00:17:54.290 --> 00:17:56.080
  • "LORD, I RECEIVE YOU,
  • 00:17:56.080 --> 00:17:57.170
  • ALL YOUR GRACE."
  • 00:17:57.170 --> 00:17:59.020
  • YOU KNOW, SARAH,
  • 00:17:59.020 --> 00:18:00.100
  • YOU REALLY ARE ON A JOURNEY
  • 00:18:00.100 --> 00:18:03.080
  • THAT YOU'RE SHARING
  • 00:18:03.080 --> 00:18:04.200
  • WITH OTHERS TO HELP THEM.
  • 00:18:04.200 --> 00:18:06.110
  • I WANT TO THANK YOU FOR THAT.
  • 00:18:06.110 --> 00:18:07.250
  • YOU KNOW WHAT OUR VIEWERS DO?
  • 00:18:07.250 --> 00:18:09.010
  • THEY'RE AMAZING PEOPLE.
  • 00:18:09.010 --> 00:18:10.090
  • THEY KNOW WHEN THEY WATCH US
  • 00:18:10.090 --> 00:18:11.260
  • THEY'RE GOING TO HEAR
  • 00:18:11.260 --> 00:18:13.060
  • THAT GOD USES PEOPLE
  • 00:18:13.060 --> 00:18:15.210
  • FROM ALL WALKS OF LIFE
  • 00:18:15.210 --> 00:18:17.000
  • AND ALL LEVELS
  • 00:18:17.000 --> 00:18:18.160
  • GOD DOES IN THEIR LIFE.
  • 00:18:20.160 --> 00:18:22.060
  • BUT WHEN WE SHOW THEM A NEED,
  • 00:18:22.060 --> 00:18:24.120
  • A VERY LEGITIMATE NEED,
  • 00:18:24.120 --> 00:18:26.010
  • THEY WANT TO MEET IT.
  • 00:18:27.100 --> 00:18:28.180
  • RIGHT NOW WE'RE ASKING
  • 00:18:28.180 --> 00:18:29.240
  • OUR VIEWERS TO HELP US
  • 00:18:29.240 --> 00:18:31.030
  • RESCUE GIRLS
  • 00:18:31.030 --> 00:18:32.220
  • AND OFTEN TIMES BOYS
  • 00:18:32.220 --> 00:18:34.290
  • WHERE THEY'VE BEEN
  • 00:18:36.120 --> 00:18:37.180
  • TAKEN PRISONER.
  • 00:18:37.180 --> 00:18:38.240
  • WE CAN SET THEM FREE.
  • 00:18:38.240 --> 00:18:39.290
  • LOVE SETS THEM FREE.
  • 00:18:39.290 --> 00:18:41.040
  • WE HAVE RELIEF WORKERS
  • 00:18:41.040 --> 00:18:42.120
  • AND MISSION WORKERS
  • 00:18:42.120 --> 00:18:43.190
  • THAT HAVE THEIR ARMS
  • 00:18:43.190 --> 00:18:44.250
  • REACHING OUT AND THEIR ARMS
  • 00:18:44.250 --> 00:18:46.030
  • AROUND THESE PRECIOUS ONES
  • 00:18:46.030 --> 00:18:47.120
  • AND YOU MAKE IT POSSIBLE.
  • 00:18:47.120 --> 00:18:49.180
  • THINK OF IT, BETTY,
  • 00:18:49.180 --> 00:18:50.290
  • WE'VE GOT VIEWERS,
  • 00:18:50.290 --> 00:18:52.070
  • AND WE WERE SO CONCERNED
  • 00:18:52.070 --> 00:18:53.180
  • YEARS AGO
  • 00:18:53.180 --> 00:18:54.270
  • WHEN WE JUST SHOWED
  • 00:18:54.270 --> 00:18:56.040
  • THE FIRST TIME OUR VIEWERS
  • 00:18:56.040 --> 00:18:57.190
  • THIS REALITY.
  • 00:18:57.190 --> 00:18:58.240
  • WE THOUGHT, WELL,
  • 00:18:58.240 --> 00:19:00.030
  • THEY'LL TELL US, "DON'T EVER
  • 00:19:00.030 --> 00:19:01.110
  • SHOW US THAT AGAIN."
  • 00:19:01.110 --> 00:19:02.180
  • THE OPPOSITE WAS TRUE,
  • 00:19:02.180 --> 00:19:03.250
  • "SHOW US HOW WE CAN HELP."
  • 00:19:03.250 --> 00:19:05.050
  • IT IS UNUSUAL BECAUSE
  • 00:19:05.050 --> 00:19:06.150
  • PEOPLE STEPPED UP
  • 00:19:06.150 --> 00:19:07.230
  • AND SAID, "WE KNOW
  • 00:19:07.230 --> 00:19:09.020
  • YOU'RE GOING TO BE RESCUING,
  • 00:19:09.020 --> 00:19:10.090
  • HERE'S OUR MATCHING GIFT."
  • 00:19:10.090 --> 00:19:11.240
  • THAT'S LOVE!
  • 00:19:11.240 --> 00:19:13.030
  • $320.000 IS A LOT OF MONEY.
  • 00:19:13.030 --> 00:19:14.250
  • IT COULD HAVE COME
  • 00:19:14.250 --> 00:19:16.030
  • FROM SOME LARGE GIFTS
  • 00:19:16.030 --> 00:19:17.100
  • OF SEVERAL THOUSAND,
  • 00:19:17.100 --> 00:19:18.140
  • IT COULD HAVE COME FROM
  • 00:19:18.140 --> 00:19:19.190
  • QUITE A FEW $1.000 --
  • 00:19:19.190 --> 00:19:20.230
  • I DON'T KNOW
  • 00:19:20.230 --> 00:19:22.000
  • HOW IT ALL CAME TOGETHER
  • 00:19:22.000 --> 00:19:23.040
  • BUT THESE ARE
  • 00:19:23.040 --> 00:19:24.080
  • INDIVIDUALS LIKE YOU
  • 00:19:24.080 --> 00:19:25.110
  • THAT MADE A COMMITMENT
  • 00:19:25.110 --> 00:19:26.150
  • TO MATCH WHAT YOU DO
  • 00:19:26.150 --> 00:19:27.200
  • BECAUSE THEY BELIEVE SO MUCH
  • 00:19:27.200 --> 00:19:29.030
  • TO RESCUE SOMEONE LIKE THAT.
  • 00:19:29.030 --> 00:19:30.110
  • AND WE CAN DO IT.
  • 00:19:30.110 --> 00:19:31.140
  • IT IS NOT AN EXAGGERATION.
  • 00:19:31.140 --> 00:19:32.200
  • IT WORKS.
  • 00:19:32.200 --> 00:19:33.280
  • WOULD YOU PLEASE
  • 00:19:33.280 --> 00:19:35.060
  • RIGHT NOW ASK GOD
  • 00:19:35.060 --> 00:19:36.110
  • WHAT HE WANTS YOU TO DO?
  • 00:19:36.110 --> 00:19:37.180
  • WHATEVER YOU DO
  • 00:19:37.180 --> 00:19:38.230
  • WILL BE MATCHED.
  • 00:19:38.230 --> 00:19:39.280
  • IT TAKES AN AVERAGE OF $128
  • 00:19:39.280 --> 00:19:41.060
  • FOR US TO REACH,
  • 00:19:41.060 --> 00:19:42.110
  • RESCUE, AND BEGIN
  • 00:19:42.110 --> 00:19:43.160
  • THE RESTORATION PROCESS.
  • 00:19:43.160 --> 00:19:44.210
  • THAT GIFT WILL BE MATCHED,
  • 00:19:44.210 --> 00:19:45.260
  • WHICH MEANS
  • 00:19:45.260 --> 00:19:47.030
  • IF YOU GIVE THE $128,
  • 00:19:47.030 --> 00:19:48.130
  • NOT JUST REACH ONE BUT TWO.
  • 00:19:48.130 --> 00:19:50.110
  • AND I REALLY,
  • 00:19:50.110 --> 00:19:51.190
  • YOU KNOW I'M GOING
  • 00:19:51.190 --> 00:19:52.260
  • TO ASK YOU TO THINK BIG.
  • 00:19:52.260 --> 00:19:54.010
  • I DON'T HAVE ANY PROBLEM
  • 00:19:54.010 --> 00:19:55.060
  • ASKING TO YOU ELEVATE
  • 00:19:55.060 --> 00:19:56.110
  • YOUR THINKING
  • 00:19:56.110 --> 00:19:57.160
  • WHEN IT COMES TO GIVING
  • 00:19:57.160 --> 00:19:58.210
  • AND THE JOY OF GIVING
  • 00:19:58.210 --> 00:19:59.260
  • AND BLESSING OTHERS.
  • 00:19:59.260 --> 00:20:01.010
  • IF YOU GIVE $1280
  • 00:20:01.010 --> 00:20:02.060
  • WE CAN REACH TEN.
  • 00:20:02.060 --> 00:20:03.110
  • BEHIND THE BRIGHT LIGHTS
  • 00:20:06.100 --> 00:20:08.020
  • THERE'S A DARKNESS WHERE A WORLD OF INNOCENCE IS LOST
  • 00:20:08.050 --> 00:20:10.200
  • AND ABUSE RUNS RAMPANT
  • 00:20:10.230 --> 00:20:12.200
  • SCARRING THE SOULS OF CHILDREN
  • 00:20:12.230 --> 00:20:14.200
  • WITH NO ONE AND NOWHERE TO TURN FOR HELP.
  • 00:20:14.230 --> 00:20:17.150
  • WITH BODIES BROKEN AND HOPES CRUSHED,
  • 00:20:17.180 --> 00:20:19.200
  • THESE YOUNG VICTIMS ARE TRAPPED
  • 00:20:19.230 --> 00:20:21.200
  • IN A NEVER-ENDING NIGHTMARE.
  • 00:20:21.230 --> 00:20:23.250
  • TODAY YOU CAN SHINE THE LIGHT OF GOD'S LOVE IN THIS DARK WORLD
  • 00:20:23.280 --> 00:20:27.080
  • TO REACH, RESCUE, AND RESTORE THESE YOUNG ONES
  • 00:20:27.110 --> 00:20:29.290
  • TO THE LIFE GOD DESIGNED FOR THEM TO LIVE.
  • 00:20:30.020 --> 00:20:33.060
  • WITH A GENEROUS $320.000 MATCHING GIFT,
  • 00:20:33.090 --> 00:20:36.100
  • NOW YOUR GIFT OF $128 TO HELP RESCUE A CHILD
  • 00:20:36.130 --> 00:20:39.150
  • CAN BE DOUBLED TO HELP TWO CHILDREN.
  • 00:20:39.180 --> 00:20:42.040
  • YOUR $64 GIFT WILL BE MATCHED TO HELP RESCUE ONE CHILD
  • 00:20:42.070 --> 00:20:45.020
  • FROM THE HORRORS OF HUMAN TRAFFICKING.
  • 00:20:45.050 --> 00:20:47.020
  • AND A $32 MISSION RESCUE GIFT
  • 00:20:47.050 --> 00:20:49.060
  • WILL BE DOUBLED TO $64.
  • 00:20:49.090 --> 00:20:51.200
  • AND WITH YOUR DONATION OF ANY AMOUNT
  • 00:20:51.230 --> 00:20:53.200
  • WE'LL SEND YOU THE FAITH, HOPE, LOVE TEA TOWEL SET.
  • 00:20:53.230 --> 00:20:56.070
  • THESE BEAUTIFULLY WOVEN HAND TOWELS
  • 00:20:56.100 --> 00:20:58.070
  • ARE A WONDERFUL REMINDER
  • 00:20:58.100 --> 00:21:00.090
  • TO REMAIN STEADFAST IN FAITH, HOPE, AND LOVE EACH DAY.
  • 00:21:00.120 --> 00:21:03.250
  • WITH YOUR GIFT OF $128 OR MORE
  • 00:21:03.280 --> 00:21:06.020
  • YOU'LL RECEIVE THE LIFE-GIVING PROVERBS JOURNAL
  • 00:21:06.050 --> 00:21:08.100
  • BOUND IN GENUINE LEATHER.
  • 00:21:08.130 --> 00:21:10.100
  • THIS JOURNAL IS FILLED WITH WISDOM
  • 00:21:10.130 --> 00:21:12.100
  • AND DAILY ENCOURAGEMENT FROM PROVERBS,
  • 00:21:12.130 --> 00:21:14.100
  • FEATURING LINED PAGES FOR YOUR PERSONAL NOTES
  • 00:21:14.130 --> 00:21:16.100
  • AS YOU REFLECT ON GODLY INSTRUCTION
  • 00:21:16.130 --> 00:21:18.100
  • TO SUCCESS IN LIFE.
  • 00:21:18.130 --> 00:21:20.100
  • FINALLY, PLEASE CONSIDER A GIFT OF $1.280
  • 00:21:20.130 --> 00:21:23.170
  • WHICH WILL NOW HELP RESCUE 20 CHILDREN!
  • 00:21:23.200 --> 00:21:25.240
  • AND YOU MAY REQUEST OUR BEAUTIFUL BRONZE SCULPTURE,
  • 00:21:25.270 --> 00:21:28.020
  • "SAFE IN THE SHEPHERD'S ARMS."
  • 00:21:28.050 --> 00:21:30.070
  • PLEASE CALL, WRITE, OR MAKE YOUR GIFT ONLINE.
  • 00:21:30.100 --> 00:21:34.050
  • James: I WANT TO SAY THIS.
  • 00:21:34.160 --> 00:21:37.160
  • THAT IF YOU'D LIKE
  • 00:21:37.160 --> 00:21:38.220
  • TO HAVE SARAH MAE'S BOOK
  • 00:21:38.220 --> 00:21:40.000
  • BECAUSE YOU THINK
  • 00:21:40.000 --> 00:21:41.060
  • IT WILL HELP SOMEONE
  • 00:21:41.060 --> 00:21:42.190
  • OR HELP YOU, YOU SAY,
  • 00:21:42.190 --> 00:21:43.240
  • "WOULD YOU SEND THAT TO ME?
  • 00:21:43.240 --> 00:21:45.000
  • I THINK I NEED
  • 00:21:45.000 --> 00:21:46.050
  • WHAT SHE SHARES."
  • 00:21:46.050 --> 00:21:47.100
  • YOU HELP TOUCH SOME
  • 00:21:47.100 --> 00:21:48.160
  • OF THOSE WHO NEED OUR HELP,
  • 00:21:48.160 --> 00:21:49.220
  • YOU JUST ASK FOR IT,
  • 00:21:49.220 --> 00:21:51.040
  • WE'LL BE GLAD
  • 00:21:51.040 --> 00:21:52.080
  • TO SEND IT TO YOU.
  • 00:21:52.080 --> 00:21:53.130
  • WOULD YOU JOIN BETTY AND ME
  • 00:21:53.130 --> 00:21:54.190
  • IN SAYING THANKS TO SARAH MAE
  • 00:21:54.190 --> 00:21:55.210
  • FOR BEING SUCH A BLESSING?
  • 00:21:55.210 --> 00:21:56.270
  • WE APPRECIATE YOU.
  • 00:21:56.270 --> 00:21:58.070
  • GOD BLESS YOU ON YOUR JOURNEY
  • 00:21:58.070 --> 00:21:59.170
  • AS YOU HELP OTHERS.
  • 00:21:59.170 --> 00:22:01.080
  • THANK ALL OF YOU
  • 00:22:01.080 --> 00:22:02.150
  • FOR WATCHING AGAIN.
  • 00:22:02.150 --> 00:22:03.160
  • THANKS FOR HELPING US
  • 00:22:03.160 --> 00:22:04.210
  • 00:22:21.020 --> 00:22:26.020
  • I NEED TO SEE YOU HERE
  • 00:22:31.020 --> 00:22:37.000
  • I NEED TO KNOW YOU'RE IN CONTROL
  • 00:22:37.030 --> 00:22:43.060
  • THOUGH MY HEART IS TORN WIDE OPEN
  • 00:22:43.090 --> 00:22:49.030
  • I WILL TRUST, I WILL REMEMBER
  • 00:22:49.060 --> 00:22:57.270
  • I NEED TO HEAR YOUR VOICE
  • 00:22:58.000 --> 00:23:03.220
  • SPEAKING TO SILENCE ALL MY DOUBTS
  • 00:23:03.250 --> 00:23:10.110
  • YOUR WORD WON'T RETURN EMPTY
  • 00:23:10.140 --> 00:23:16.080
  • YOU WILL BREAK THROUGH EVERY DARKNESS
  • 00:23:16.110 --> 00:23:23.090
  • EVEN WHEN MY BREATH IS WEAK
  • 00:23:23.120 --> 00:23:27.100
  • I WILL SING, I WILL SING
  • 00:23:27.130 --> 00:23:35.050
  • EVEN IN MY SUFFERING
  • 00:23:35.080 --> 00:23:39.070
  • I WILL SING, I WILL SING
  • 00:23:39.100 --> 00:23:44.260
  • I NEED TO FEEL YOUR HOPE
  • 00:23:48.260 --> 00:23:54.270
  • RISING ABOVE MY GREATEST FEARS
  • 00:23:55.000 --> 00:24:01.100
  • EVEN DEATH HAS BEEN DEFEATED
  • 00:24:01.130 --> 00:24:07.160
  • I WILL TRUST, I WILL REMEMBER
  • 00:24:07.190 --> 00:24:14.170
  • EVEN WHEN THE SHADOWS FALL
  • 00:24:14.200 --> 00:24:18.270
  • I WILL SING, I WILL SING
  • 00:24:19.000 --> 00:24:26.230
  • EVEN WHEN THE NIGHT IS LONG
  • 00:24:26.260 --> 00:24:30.270
  • I WILL SING, I WILL SING
  • 00:24:31.000 --> 00:24:37.160
  • HALLELUJAH
  • 00:24:40.200 --> 00:24:46.270
  • I SURRENDER ALL TO YOU
  • 00:24:47.000 --> 00:24:52.170
  • HALLELUJAH
  • 00:24:52.200 --> 00:24:58.150
  • YOU ARE GOD YOU WON'T BE SHAKEN
  • 00:24:58.180 --> 00:25:04.210
  • HALLELUJAH
  • 00:25:04.240 --> 00:25:10.220
  • I SURRENDER ALL TO YOU
  • 00:25:10.250 --> 00:25:16.230
  • HALLELUJAH
  • 00:25:16.260 --> 00:25:22.260
  • YOU ARE GOD YOU WON'T BE SHAKEN
  • 00:25:22.290 --> 00:25:29.010
  • HALLELUJAH
  • 00:25:29.040 --> 00:25:35.080
  • I SURRENDER ALL TO YOU
  • 00:25:35.110 --> 00:25:41.120
  • HALLELUJAH
  • 00:25:41.150 --> 00:25:47.120
  • YOU ARE GOD YOU WON'T BE SHAKEN
  • 00:25:47.150 --> 00:25:53.210
  • HALLELUJAH
  • 00:25:53.240 --> 00:25:59.130
  • I SURRENDER ALL TO YOU
  • 00:25:59.160 --> 00:26:06.010
  • HALLELUJAH
  • 00:26:06.040 --> 00:26:11.270
  • YOU ARE GOD YOU WON'T BE SHAKEN
  • 00:26:12.000 --> 00:26:19.090
  • EVEN WHEN MY BREATH IS WEAK
  • 00:26:23.110 --> 00:26:27.230
  • I WILL SING, I WILL SING
  • 00:26:27.260 --> 00:26:35.250
  • EVEN IN MY SUFFERING
  • 00:26:35.280 --> 00:26:40.030
  • I WILL SING, I WILL SING
  • 00:26:40.060 --> 00:26:46.280
  • Announcer: ARE YOU CONCERNED ABOUT KEEPING YOUR FAMILY
  • 00:26:51.230 --> 00:26:53.230
  • WELL-EQUIPPED TO MANAGE YOUR RESOURCES WHEN YOU PASS AWAY
  • 00:26:53.260 --> 00:26:56.180
  • AND LEAVING A LASTING LEGACY?
  • 00:26:56.210 --> 00:26:58.240
  • CONTACT LIFE PLANNING SERVICES TODAY!
  • 00:26:58.270 --> 00:27:01.110
  • DO YOU HAVE THE COURAGE TO BE HEALED?
  • 00:27:02.210 --> 00:27:04.280
  • BEST-SELLING AUTHOR, MARK RUTLAND EXPLAINS
  • 00:27:05.010 --> 00:27:06.250
  • HOW FAITH IS NOT THE ONLY VARIABLE NEEDED.
  • 00:27:06.280 --> 00:27:09.090
  • TOMORROW!
  • 00:27:09.120 --> 00:27:12.140
  • LIFE TODAY IS MADE POSSIBLE BY THE SUPPORTERS OF LIFE OUTREACH INTERNATIONAL.
  • 00:27:12.170 --> 00:27:15.290
  • YOUR GIFT WILL BE USED EXCLUSIVELY FOR THE EXEMPT PURPOSES OF LIFE.
  • 00:27:16.020 --> 00:27:19.020
  • THE MINISTRY FEATURES SPECIFIC OUTREACHES
  • 00:27:19.050 --> 00:27:21.040
  • AS EXAMPLES OF THE PROGRAMS IT SUPPORTS AND CONDUCTS.
  • 00:27:21.070 --> 00:27:23.060
  • GIFTS ARE CONSIDERED TO BE WITHOUT RESTRICTION
  • 00:27:23.090 --> 00:27:25.080
  • AS TO USE UNLESS EXPLICITLY STIPULATED BY THE DONOR.
  • 00:27:25.110 --> 00:27:27.120
  • THE MINISTRY IS A MEMBER OF THE E.C.F.A.
  • 00:27:27.150 --> 00:27:29.220